The Return
by famous99
Summary: Takes place after the S1 finale. Sandy will do anything to bring his family back together.
1. The Ultimatum

_So, I've had this story working in my head for a while now and I guess I'm a little stuck on my other story or I just can't get this one out of my head, so I decided to just start and write it.  I'm not giving up on _Downward Spiral_.  Don't worry!  I'll update soon.  I just had to start kicking this one around.  It's set after the season finale and is my not so nice version of how Sandy brings Ryan home.  I don't know where I'm going with this, so it'll depend on people's reactions._

_As usual:  The O.C. belongs to Fox and Josh Schwartz and I'm just taking my liberties._

__

            They hadn't stopped crying since Ryan had left.  When Theresa's yellow convertible had pulled away with Ryan in the front seat, Kirsten had gone to the pool house to pull off the dirty linen but instead she had just sat and cried and cried until Sandy came to hold her in his arms.  That was before they had noticed the notes left on Seth's night table.  Four days later, countless of phone calls between the Newport police department and the Coast Guard and the tears still hadn't dried up.

            Sandy had never been so grateful for Caleb Nichol.  It was no secret that he hated his father-in-law, but Caleb's power had lit a fire under the lackadaisical police department and the coast guard so that bringing Seth Cohen home became their number one priority.  They had tried the, "he's seventeen and will come home as soon as he sees how hard the streets are," routine, but Sandy knew his son.  He knew Seth had a stubborn streak and he knew that without Ryan, Seth would not want to come home.

The tears still hadn't dried up, even though Seth was on the way home, because their family wasn't complete.  Ryan was still in Chino, refusing to return.  Even after he had heard that Seth had run away.  He had asked Sandy and Kirsten if there was anything he could do.  When they had said, come home, he had sadly shook his head and said, "you know I can't do that.  Theresa and the baby need me.  I'll visit when he comes back."

So Sandy had left it at that.  But inwardly, he kept kicking himself for letting Ryan go.  Had Seth asked if he could go sailing to Tahiti, Sandy and Kirsten would never have let.  How could a seventeen-year-old manage on the vast Pacific Ocean on his own?  How could Ryan, seventeen-years-old, manage to support a girlfriend and a child?  Sandy knew he had failed Ryan as a parent, but he had a plan to bring both his sons home.

            "What are we going to say to Seth when he comes home?" Kirsten asked weakly.  She had red rims all around her eyes.  The lids were swollen from so much crying. 

            "That he's grounded until he goes off to college, if we even let him go off to College."

            Kirsten offered a wan smile.  "Seriously Sandy."

            "I'm serious about grounding him.  He was being selfish and stupid.  He could've been killed on that tiny little boat out in the ocean."

            They were sitting by the pool staring at the chlorine colored pool.  Kirsten was squinting into the sun, trying to avoid looking at the pool house where Ryan had slept only a few days ago.

            "I think we'll have to calm down a little bit.  It won't get us anywhere if we go off on him."

            Sandy sighed. 

            "I'm glad he's coming home."

            "Maybe Ryan will come to…. visit?" Kirsten asked hopefully.

            "I'm going there today," Sandy said.  "And I'm bringing him home."  He wore a determined expression on his face.

            "How are you going to do that?"  Kirsten placed her hand over Sandy's fist.  She wanted to believe him.  She wanted so much for her family be complete again.

            "Don't worry, honey.  I have a plan."  He looked out beyond the gate of the backyard, which looked over the ocean.  He recalled how impressed Ryan had been when he had first arrived, even though he had refused to admit it.  He had tried to act so cool.  "I should never have let him go," Sandy said softly.  "As his guardian, I should have insisted that he stay here and we'd figure out this whole Theresa debacle together."

            He stood abruptly, nearly knocking the sturdy patio chair over.  "I told Ryan I would meet him at Theresa's place at one.  He said he has a job interview at two."  He lightly kissed the top of his wife's head and waved good-bye.  He hoped his plan would work.

            Sandy alternated listening to the news, talk radio, and some of Seth's favorite tunes on the long ride to Chino.  He knew how he would get Ryan to come back, but he didn't have all the details worked out.  Namely, Theresa.  Ryan wouldn't have a choice, he would have to return with Sandy, but he would still want to remain loyal to Theresa. 

            He had to admit that he admired his foster son's loyalty. But Ryan didn't realize how much responsibility it was to raise a child.  When Seth had come, Kirsten had only been about twenty-three and he had been in his late twenties, and they had barely coped.  There had been sleepless nights, and constant crying, dirty bottles littering the sink, and they had both been elbow deep in dirty diapers.  But Kirsten had finished college and he had finished law school and even if they weren't living well, they had the means and ability to support themselves and a child.  Ryan and Theresa didn't have a high school diploma.  How on earth were they going to support a child?

            Sandy tried to push the rambling thoughts from his head, because he could feel his shoulders and neck tensing as the car sped along the highway.  He was clenching the steering wheel so tightly, that his knuckles were white like a ghost.  When he confronted Ryan he had to be calm and even toned.  Ryan did not respond well to anger.  Anytime he had rebuked Ryan over the year the boy had lived with them, he had to remember to soften it with kind words, because in his life before Ryan had only known anger and fury.

Sandy pulled up to Theresa's house, which was next door to the house that Dawn had abandoned her son.  He wondered how Ryan could stand living there. It looked like another family had moved in.  There were toys scattered in the front yard and laundry hung on a line roped along two trees.  He tried to picture someone hanging out their laundry in Newport, but he knew it would never happen.

"Hey Sandy." 

Theresa was sitting on the front porch, her feet resting on a small footstool.  She started to get up, but he could see she was tired and waved at her to sit back down.  He pulled off his sunglasses, folded them and put them in his jacket pocket.  It was too hot for a suit, but Sandy had an appointment with a client later that afternoon.

"Theresa," he said with a genuine smile, he bore no hard feelings to the poor confused girl.  "How are you feeling?"

"Tired," she admitted with a smile.  "Nauseous.  Morning sickness must be a euphemism, because I'm nauseous all day long."

"Kirsten was like that when she was pregnant with Seth.  It passed after the first trimester."

"Well, I'm passed that Mr. Cohen.  I just started my fourth month."

Sandy had never asked when this baby had been conceived, though if it was Ryan's child it had to be during the time Marissa and Ryan weren't together because of the Oliver disaster.  Ryan wasn't the type to cheat on his girlfriend.  Not that the two had been apart very long, but apparently it had been long enough for him to bed his first love.

"Ryan's inside straightening up.  I'm sure the two of you want some alone time.  So just go right in."

Sandy patted Theresa on the shoulder and turned the knob on the front door and let himself in.  The room was simply decorated with a raggedy brown sofa and a matching chair.  There were bookcases made of pressed wood lined up against the wall, with tattered books and magazines spilling off the shelves. 

Ryan was standing in middle of the room with an upright vacuum cleaner in one hand and the chord in the other.  His back was to Sandy and he didn't notice his foster father until Sandy came up behind him and tapped him on the shoulder.  Ryan jumped five feet in the air.

"I didn't mean to scare you," Sandy said as Ryan shut off the vacuum.

"'Skay.  I just thought I was alone.  Theresa is supposed to be resting on the porch."

"She's doing a fine job of resting.  I didn't let her get up for me."

"Thanks.  She's on her feet all day waiting on tables.  If we didn't need the money—" Ryan stopped mid sentence.  He wasn't trying to ask Sandy for money and didn't want him to think that he was.  He was surprised, but not upset, when Sandy made no offer for an extra income. 

"You look tired," said Sandy.

"I've been working hard, trying to find work, running errands."  Ryan sighed.  "Can I get you a drink?"

Sandy shook his head.  "What happened to your face?"  He just noticed that there was a fading bruise on Ryan's cheek.  

Ryan put up his hand by the bruise.  "Eddie came over.  We're not exactly on the best of terms."

Sandy let out an exasperated sigh.  He wanted to lecture to say something, but he stopped himself.  He was there to end this madness not to perpetuate it.  "Seth will be coming home tonight.  The police in Catalina put him on the first flight home."

"I'm glad.  I'm glad he's safe."  Ryan studied the tassels on the edge of the rug. 

"Kirsten is putting together a big dinner. We'd both like it if you were there.  Seth too."

"She's cooking?" Ryan asked, changing the subject on purpose.

Sandy waggled his brows.  "She's serious about those cooking lessons," he smirked.  But don't change the subject.  Will you come for dinner?"

Ryan noticed that Sandy wasn't inviting Theresa.  "I have a job interview.  I can't miss it.  It's too good an opportunity."

"Let's sit Ryan."  Sandy hitched up his slacks and sank into the sagging couch.  "We need to talk."

If he had been yelling, Ryan would have thought he was in trouble.  Like the time he had unfairly tackled Luke Ward on the soccer field.  But Ryan recognized the tone anyway.  It was his no nonsense voice which left no room for argument.  So Ryan sat.

"Before you left last week, I told you that as your guardian, I didn't have to let you go." 

Ryan nodded, not sure where this was going.

"I let you go, because I knew this was something you had to do. But I made a mistake.  Your seventeen-years-old you're not equipped to handle what's coming."

"I know this is going to be hard," Ryan admitted.  "But I have to do this."

"You don't even know if this kids is yours."

"It doesn't matter if its mine or not."

"Yes it does.  You are not going to throw your life away for someone else's kid."

"Sandy," Ryan started to object.

"No.  You're going to listen to me.  Kirsten and I want you to come home."

"I can't do that.  Theresa needs me.  If it's not my kid, I'll deal with it then.  I'm thinking of asking her to marry me."  Ryan refused to meet Sandy's eyes and studied his hands.  They were smooth and soft, but he knew that wouldn't last long as soon as he started working construction.  They would be calloused and hard.  They would ache.  He would be sore all over.  Nothing like the life he had led the past year living with the Cohens.  They hadn't even let him hold a part time job during the school year, saying it would interfere with his schoolwork.

If Sandy wasn't sure about what he was planning to do, he was sure of it now.  No way was he going to let Ryan flush his life down the toilet by getting married at seventeen.

"Ryan, you're coming home."

"Sandy," Ryan started desperately, as desperate as he sounded when his mother told him to get out of the house and he asked, "but mom, where am I supposed to go?"   Sandy stopped him with an upheld hand.

"Listen to me, Ryan.  You're still on probation.  And I'm your guardian."  Sandy had hoped he would be able to convince Ryan to return to Newport without resorting to blackmail, but he would do anything to keep his family together.  "If you don't come home with me tonight, I'm going to report you as a runaway and that will mean you're in violation of your probation.  If you're brought in, it could mean going back to the Juvenile Detention Center."


	2. Back to Newport

_I'm glad you like this story. As soon as I post this chapter I'm going to work on _Downward Spiral. _So much for my list of things to do today. I'm in such an unproductive mood._

_And I don't own the O.C. or any of its characters._

"You're joking, right?" Ryan asked.

"No. I'm not."

Ryan's jaw dropped. "I don't get it. How—"

"I'll do anything to keep our family together. Kirsten and I are sorry we ever let you go. I'm just trying to correct the mistake we made."

"Sandy, I can't leave Theresa behind."

"If she wants, she can move into the Pool House. Hailey moved out yesterday to live with Jimmy. You'll take her room."

"And what? You'll build a nursery for the baby? You can't be serious."

"Kirsten and I will do whatever we have to do to keep our family together," Sandy said more harshly than he meant it to come out. "And to keep you from trashing your life. You have a real chance to dig yourself out of this hole."

"Who the hell are you to pass judgment on our way of life? Just because you think you're cut from the same cloth? Because you lived a tough life in the Bronx? It gives you no right to decide that this isn't a good life."

"Was it a good life? Was it good when you landed up in the hospital with a broken rib? That was because you fell down a flight of stairs, right? But you weren't pushed. That's what the police and social services concluded. You were just clumsy. And how about the time you broke your arm? A sports injury, right? Even though you weren't party of any teams at that point."

Ryan rubbed his head. His hair was getting long and shaggy and he was in need of a haircut. If he was still at the Cohens' Kirsten would start threatening to cut his hair herself if he didn't get to the barbershop. He pretended to resent it, but secretly, he liked that she cared about whether or not he ate enough and if his hair was too long.

"Why are you bringing all those things up? You lived in the Bronx and you didn't have money, but no one abused you. Poverty doesn't mean abuse. Tell me the truth, how many women in Newport are the victims of domestic abuse? How many kids are being beaten in Newport? It has nothing to do with money or the lack thereof. Abuse is all over the place and it's not fair to say that just because I choose to live in Chino and to raise my child here that I'll abuse him or her."

"I didn't — I would never—" Sandy spluttered. "I would never imply that Ryan. I just mean that you might resent this child if you give up so much. Let yourself finish school. Go to college. Kirsten and I are willing to support you."

"I choose to stay here. With Theresa. She wants – no she needs- to be near her mother. And I need to be here for this baby. I need to make sure it doesn't live the life I left." He didn't say it, but Ryan was afraid if he went back to Chino then Theresa would end up with Eddie. And if Eddie could hit Theresa, how long would it take him to get drunk and take it out on a small child? Ryan would not let that happen to Theresa's baby. Even if the baby wasn't his!

Sandy lost the contrite tone he had used when Ryan thought he was suggesting that poverty equaled abuse. He took on the firm hard voice he had often used when scolding either one of his sons. The one where he met business. "I already told you, if you choose to stay here, then I'm going to report you as a runaway."

They heard a gasp from the doorway. Sandy's head whipped around and he saw Theresa, clad in her waitress uniform, standing in the doorway.

"It's okay, Theresa. He's not serious."

"I am very serious, Ryan."

"Well, I'm not going back. I'm staying with Theresa."

"Why? So Eddie can beat you up? And what if turns out it is his baby? You think he's just going to let you raise it? Ryan, you can't push us away from this. You need our help." Sandy didn't say it, but he wanted to add, _you need your parents_.

"Not in the way you're trying to give it," he said coldly.

"Will he go to jail, Mr. Cohen. If you report him as a runaway?"

"Yes," said Sandy simply.

"Ryan—"

"Not you too, Theresa."

"Ryan. They must really love you to sink to this level." Sandy didn't miss the disgust in Theresa's voice. "It doesn't matter. You won't be any use to the baby or me if you're in jail. You're better off going back to Newport. It's not like you even belong here anymore. Anyone can see that." There was a hint of sadness in her voice.

Ryan clenched and unclenched his fist. He felt like hitting someone or something. But he couldn't go on a rampage in Theresa's home. And pummeling Sandy wasn't an option, even if it was tempting. So Ryan took deep breaths to steady his rage.

"I'll help you pack your things," Theresa offered quietly.

"What about Eddie?" Ryan asked.

"My mom is here. She'll keep Eddie at bay. She always had a way with him. And Arturo, he's supposed to be released from jail next month. He'll take care of me then."

"Theresa," Sandy broke in. "You're welcome to stay with us. I was telling Ryan—"

"No thank you, Mr. Cohen. I need to be here with my family. We'll be fine."

"If this baby is Ryan's, we'll support you."

"I don't need your money, Mr. Cohen. It was never about that." She walked away from Sandy and disappeared into another room. Ryan followed her, leaving Sandy in the living room, alone and feeling dirty. He felt the same way as when he had helped keep Uncle Sean out of jail, by brokering an illegal deal to get the charges dropped. He knew he had broken twenty different laws that night and it made him feel immoral and underhanded, but at the same time he had felt self-righteous, because he would do anything for his wife and children.

Ryan came out of the room fifteen minutes later holding his black duffel bag and wearing his leather jacket and gray hoodie. Ryan wasn't smiling. He didn't look remotely happy to be returning back to Newport, but Sandy reminded himself he was doing the right thing.

The hour-long drive back was silent. Sandy left the radio on a music channel, because he knew Ryan got bored from talk radio. He told him to change the dial to any station he liked, but Ryan just leaned his head against the cold glass and stared out the window. Sandy opened and closed is mouth a few times to say something, but decided that Ryan just needed his time.

When Sandy waved to the guard at the gatehouse, as they drove into their gated community, the guard said, "I saw your other boy, Mr. Cohen. He looks well. I'm sure you're glad to have your family back home tonight."

Word spread fast in Newport.

So Seth was home. Sandy glanced at Ryan to see if it would evoke any reaction, but Ryan wore a stony mask and Sandy couldn't read how Ryan was really feeling. He was starting to feel guilty for his manipulative behavior.

He pulled up in front of the house and pulled the keys out of the ignition. "Kirsten is going to be ecstatic. She'll probably jump all over you and slobber you with hugs and kisses, so just be warned."

Ryan shrugged. He didn't really believe that would happen. Kirsten wasn't the touchy feely type. Well, except with Sandy. It seemed like those two couldn't keep their hands off of each other. He and Seth had often walked in on the two of them and their public displays of affection.

"You ready to come in?"

Ryan shrugged again.

"You're not going to make it easy. Are you?"

"Why should I?"

"Because I did this for your own good."

Ryan shook his head. "No. You did this for you and Kirsten. Not for me. Maybe for Seth. I'm not sure. But this has nothing to do with what's best for me." He opened the door and grabbed his duffel out of the back seat of the car. "I'm going to go around and put my stuff in the pool house. I just need to get myself together before I see anyone."

"You know, now that Hailey is gone, Kirsten and I would prefer that you move into that room."

"Does Kirsten even know that I'm coming back?"

Sandy hesitated. "She knows that's what I set out to do today. Just come in, Ryan. We'll worry about where you sleep later."

Ryan rolled his eyes, but he followed Sandy into the house. He had been wrong, because the first thing Kirsten did was throw her arms around him. She squeezed him so hard, he had to beg her for room to breathe and while she gave him some room, she didn't let go. She gently tugged the back of his hair and said it was time for a haircut.

"It's only been four days," he said, suppressing a smile.

"Well, your hair grew a lot." She laughed through her tears. They were the happy ones for the first time in a week. "You're not just here for dinner, right," she asked, eyeing his duffel.

"I'm here for the duration," he said dully.

"Good, because you should have never gone. You or Seth."

"Where is Seth?" Ryan asked changing the subject. "The rent-a-cop at the guardhouse said Seth had come home."

"He's taking a shower. Getting ready for what he calls the inquisition."

Ryan couldn't help his smile. Kirsten was thrilled to see it, but she noticed the smile didn't extend to his eyes. Something had happened in Chino and she was certain that Ryan had not come back to Newport of his own free will.

"Why don't you put your things down? You should take Hailey's old room. Tomorrow we can go shopping, buy new furniture, pick out a new color to paint the walls. We can finally get you a decent desktop computer so you don't kill your back using that laptop. I hated how you would type on your bed."

"I don't need new stuff Kirsten. The pool house is fine."

"No," she insisted. "I want you upstairs. With the rest of the family."

He sighed. "Whatever." He took the steps, two by two, and dumped his stuff in the room next to Seth's. He closed his eyes and leaned against the wall. Maybe he'd ask for a punching back, because he could really stand to punch something. His eyes snapped open and noticed the pile of pillows on the bed. He only slept with one pillow, but obviously Hailey hadn't. He walked over to the bed and started to pound at the pile.

"What did those pillows ever do to you? They weren't soft enough? Get in the way of some fine sex? Maybe just maybe they didn't satisfy you those nights when you didn't get any."

Seth.

Ryan whirled around to face his foster brother. Seth was grinning from ear to ear; his wet curls fell into his face. His tee shirt clung to his chest, damp from being thrown on without properly drying himself. Obviously, Seth had been eager to get on with his parents' inquisition.

"So how was Catalina?"

"Never got the chance to see more than the inside of the police station." Seth sighed and walked into the room. It was the mirror image of his room, with a long hallway before it broke out into an ordinary rectangle. But the similarities ended there.

"That sucks."

Seth shrugged. "You're here to stay, right?"

Ryan nodded. "I guess."

"Then it's doesn't matter anymore. I didn't want to stay if you weren't here, but if you are here, then it'll be okay."

"Yeah."

"You don't sound convinced."

"Whatever."

"I see our time apart hasn't improved your verbal skills."

"It was only four days Seth."

"It felt like a lifetime."

"That's because you decided to try and sail to Tahiti on your own."

"Yeah. So much for my big plans to bring Summer along."

"She was okay with you taking off?"

Seth shrugged. "I don't know. I left her a note."

"A note?" Ryan raised his brows. Seth recognized Ryan's classic look. It was almost as memorable as Gary Coleman's "watchya talking about, Willis?"

"Yeah. I know. It wasn't my finest moment. I'll have to do some serious groveling to repair that relationship."

"What about the one with your parents?"

"Oh. They'll ground me. Yell. And they'll get over it. It's how they work."

"So much for your summer."

Seth shrugged. "It wouldn't have been much of a summer without you around. Maybe we'll be grounded together."

"I had permission to go."

"Which they obviously reneged. Or did Dad do a really good job of persuading you to come home?"

"A little of both," Ryan said, but he didn't elaborate.

He was saved from any further questions by a light knock on the door. Sandy didn't wait for an answer and just walked right in. Ryan guessed he wouldn't have any more privacy in the guest room than in the pool house. The Cohens believed in a knock and enter code of ethics.

"Mom has food on the table."

"She didn't cook, did she?" asked Seth, horrified at the thought.

Sandy shook his head, suppressing a smile. He wondered why the joke never got old. "It's Mexican. Come on down before the food gets cold."

"It's barely five o'clock," Ryan said. "Isn't it early for dinner?"

"I asked for a meal," Seth answered. "I didn't eat anything all day. It's okay. We'll go out later and grab another meal."

"You're not going out," Sandy said to Seth. "You know we're about to ground you."

"Well you hadn't yet, so I thought the inevitable could be postponed. What about him?" Seth asked pointing to Ryan. "He on house arrest too?"

Sandy avoided Ryan's eyes. Seth's choice of words had been a poor one. But his son had no way of knowing how Sandy had forced Ryan home.

"Ryan didn't runaway," Sandy said simply.

The boys were both safely tucked away in their rooms. Seth was moping, because Sandy and Kirsten had laid down the law, imposing one of the worst groundings they had ever thought up on Seth. They assumed he was reading, because it was the only thing they hadn't taken from him.

"You know, we're going to have to gradually give him back some of his privileges or the next month is going to be pure hell," Kirsten said, nuzzling her husband's neck.

"I know. But he's got to learn his lesson."

"No argument from me," she said. "So, what did you say to Ryan? How did you convince him to come back?" She rolled to her side so that she faced Sandy in bed. "Come on," she cajoled, when Sandy didn't answer right away. "He looked sort of distant. Like he wasn't glad to be back."

Sandy sighed. He better tell Kirsten himself, because it would eventually come out and his wife would not appreciate it coming from another source. So Sandy told her. It only took a few seconds, but when he finished, Kirsten wasn't cuddled close to him. She was sitting upright in the bed, clutching her blanket to her chest as if she was embarrassed for Sandy to see her in her lingerie.

"Oh Sandy," she cried. "How could you?"


	3. Shopping Expedition

_

* * *

Usual disclaimers apply._

It was already ten in the morning and Ryan hadn't come out of his room. Kirsten suspected he was holed up there trying to stay out of the family's way, because it wasn't like Ryan to sleep in, even if it was summer. She knew there was no way Ryan would easily slip back into the Cohen household after what Sandy had done. She still wanted to throttle her husband. As it was, Kirsten was giving him the silent treatment. Sleep hadn't assuaged her anger.

Kirsten softly knocked on his bedroom door. It would be different having him live inside the house. She supposed in some ways it gave him more privacy, because three walls weren't composed of glass, but when he was in the pool house she knew if he decent or not by the positioning of the shades. If they were up, it was usually safe to come in. If they were down, he was either sleeping, getting ready, or just needed some alone time. It was a code they had silently agreed on and it had worked well.

"Ryan," she called, when he didn't answer her knock. She rapped her knuckles on the wooden door, louder this time. "Ryan. Are you up?"

He yanked open the door. "I'm up."

He was dressed too.

"You didn't come down for breakfast."

"I'm not hungry," he said with a shrug.

"Well, there's coffee."

"I'm trying to cut down."

"Well, if you're not doing anything, I'd love to have your company."

He sighed, but nodded his head, because he just couldn't refuse Kirsten. He followed her into the kitchen, his feet shuffling behind her. He settled into the stool along the counter while she sliced a bagel in half.

"Seth's out back, floating in the pool. He said he got used to waking up at first light while he was out on the Ocean."

"No window shades," Ryan offered.

Kirsten smiled. "No window shades," she conceded. "You know, he's going to be a royal pain while he's grounded."

Ryan shrugged. "Seth's always a royal pain." As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he wanted to switch feet. How could he say that about her son? He had meant it lightly as a joke, but it had come out wrong. So he was relieved to see her smiling. She had understood.

"I thought we'd go to South Coast Plaza and look for new furniture for your room. Then we could grab some lunch. That is if you don't have any other plans?"

"No one knows I'm back," he said with a shrug.

"Okay. Then it's settled. As soon as I finish eating, I'll tell Seth that we're going out."

"I thought I'd go down to the pier and see if I could get my old job back at the crab shack. I need to send Theresa money."

"Oh."

Last time he took the job without asking them first. She and Sandy had let him keep it, because it was summer and it would keep him busy and out of trouble. That was before they really knew him. And it was something he felt obligated to do, because he wasn't comfortable taking so much from them. But as soon as school had started they had insisted that he quit. He had put up an argument, but he had lost it and was forced to accept the same weekly allowance that Seth had. She knew it had hurt his pride, though she had hoped he liked being treated equal to Seth.

She and Sandy hadn't considered he might want to get another job. It was summer, so there was no reason to object, but she didn't like that he felt like he had to work. Especially to support his pregnant girlfriend. He was just seventeen-years-old.

"Sandy and I are planning to send Theresa a stipend each month. You don't have to work, Ryan."

"I want to work." His blue eyes pleaded with her.

"Just for the summer," she relented.

He didn't say thank you, but she read it in his eyes.

"Well, good that's settled. So, we'll stop by the pier, see if you can get your job back and then go onto South Coast Plaza."

"You don't have to get me new furniture. The room is fine as it is."

"Oh please. It's not suitable for a teenage boy. We'll find something you like. Come on," she coaxed. "It'll be fun. We'll order a new bedroom set. Some new linen. The painter is coming over this afternoon and we can pick out a color. You should really make it your own. You never got to do that in the pool house."

Ryan couldn't picture himself putting up posters. He had never done that in his mom's house, because whenever she or her boyfriends got pissed off drunk they'd go tearing through his room ripping everything off his walls. His posters never lasted more than a couple of days, so soon he simply gave up on them. But it wasn't worth arguing with Kirsten. She was determined that Ryan have his own space.

An hour later Kirsten pulled into the pier's parking lot.

"You don't have to come in with me," Ryan said when he saw her unbuckling her seatbelt.

"It's too hot to stay in the car. I won't cramp your style. I'll stay outside."

Ryan rolled his eyes, but didn't try to argue anymore. Kirsten leaned against the railing and watched him walk in to the restaurant and tried peer through the window to determine how it was going. She couldn't see and definitely couldn't hear, but she didn't need to supersonic hearing or x-ray vision to figure out that it hadn't gone well when he came out.

"What happened?" she asked with genuine concern.

Ryan hated that Kirsten was being so nice to him. It made it difficult to stay angry with her. And he was still livid with both Sandy and Kirsten. He belonged in Chino right now, looking for a job to support Theresa. So he could rub her feet after a particularly grueling day at the diner and she in turn could rub his shoulders when the heavy construction work got underway, because that was what he imagined he would do. He belonged in Chino so that he could protect her and the baby from Eddy.

"He doesn't have any jobs. Said that I should have come a couple of weeks ago."

"I'm sorry Ryan. You know, I could probably find you something to do at the Newport Group. You'd probably enjoy it. That is if you're still interested in Architecture. As long as it doesn't bother you being stuck with your mom all day long."

The words had slipped out of her mouth without thought, and she could tell they took Ryan by surprise. Especially the word mom.

His eyes slid from her face to the floor. "I guess that would be okay. I need the money. You know, for Theresa."

She sighed, not about to waste her breath trying to explain that he didn't have to work to support Theresa. They could send her the money. It was funny, because the more she thought about it the more she realized that if it were Seth she'd force him to go get a job. But children couldn't all be treated the same. Especially her two boys. Seth expected his parents to support him and to bail him out of trouble. He would need to take responsibility. Ryan took too much responsibility on his shoulders. She just wanted to give him the opportunity to be a kid.

"Let's go shopping."

"You mean let's go torture Ryan," he said lightly, but he let her drag him to the mall.

Three hours later they were back in the Cohen kitchen. The floor was littered with bags, full of linen, throw pillows, even a beanbag. It was as if Kirsten had been fulfilling her own childhood dreams, though Ryan suspected she had everything she wanted as a child. Kirsten had tried to buy him some more clothes, but he had drawn the line there, saying he still had his summer wardrobe from last year and there was no need to buy him anything else.

He knew that Kirsten had snagged a couple of button down shirts and jeans on the sly and they would end up on his bed sometime during the next week with a note to tell him to try it on and to let her know if they fit or not. She had done the same thing throughout the year. He couldn't stop them from buying things for him, but he didn't have to like it.

"Hey, how was your shopping trip?" Sandy swung around the counter and slapped Ryan on the back before he bent down to kiss his wife. He didn't miss that both Ryan and Kirsten visibly shrank from him. He wasn't going to gain their forgiveness that easily.

Ryan waited for Kirsten to answer Sandy. He didn't feel like talking to him, but when Kirsten remained silent and continued to fuss around the kitchen, putting away the clean dishes from the dishwasher, Ryan said, "it was fine." He got up from the table, grabbed a couple of bags and went up to his new room. He wished he could slink into the pool house.

"Kirsten, you can't ignore me forever," Sandy said as soon as they were alone.

"It's working fine for me."

"Honey, I know you're mad, but I did what I had to do to get him back here. We both agreed he had to come back."

"I didn't agree to what you did. Now he hates us. All the trust we built with him over the last year was flushed down the crapper because you barreled ahead without thinking." She threw a dishtowel into the sink and turned so her back was to him. She could see Seth sitting in a lounge chair. He had a book in his hand, but she didn't miss the headphones wires coming out of his ears. She thought they had confiscated his ipod. Maybe it was his discman. The kid had so many gadgets, she couldn't keep track.

Sandy stepped behind her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. "We'll get through this. We'll rebuild his trust as soon as he sees that being here is what's best for him."

"I had to beg him to come out of his room this morning."

"Maybe I should have stayed home from work."

"So he could ignore us both? No. At least he talked to me some. He's going to work for me at the Newport Group."

"Work?"

They still weren't looking at each other but out the window, staring at Seth who was oblivious to all the angst in the house. "He wanted a job at the Crab Shack. But there weren't any."

"Why does he need to work?"

"Sandy, this is Ryan. Why do you think he wants a job?"

"Okay. I'm being thick." He breathed out heavily. "He's really pissed at me."

"You blackmailed him."

"That's such a nasty word."

"Fine. Emotional extortion. You made him afraid of us."

They stopped talking as Seth made his way into the kitchen. "Dad, you're home early." He eyed all the packages still on the floor. Ryan hadn't returned to take anymore up to his room. "And mom, you obviously chose to spend today, rather than make."

"Ryan and I needed to get things for his room. Can you grab a couple of those on your way up and deliver it to him."

"Do I look like a manservant?" he asked glibly.

Kirsten was not amused.

"Okay. Okay. I didn't know harsh labor was going to be part of my punishment."

Seth grabbed as many bags as he could carry and trudged up the stairs. He knocked before letting himself into Ryan's room.

"Hope you're decent," he called out.

"Come in Seth."

"You know you missed me."

"It was four days, Seth."

"Four endless days."

"Because you were in middle of nowhere in nothing but a dinky little sailboat."

"The Summer Breeze is not dinky." Seth flopped onto Ryan's bed, rumpling the perfectly made sheets. He was still damp from his swim in the pool, but that didn't seem to bother him and he didn't catch Ryan's glare.

"The 'rents looked pretty intense. I know they're discussing your homecoming." Seth fluffed a pillow under his head. "So how did Dad convince you to come home?" When Ryan didn't answer, Seth took the pillow and threw it at him. "Obviously it was something big, because Dad looks miserable. Mom looks pissed. And you look pathetic."

Ryan knew Seth would eventually find out. Seth always did. So he said, "Sandy said he'd call the police and I'd be in violation of my probation," Ryan mumbled.

Seth's jaw dropped. "He what?"

"You heard me."

"There must be wax in my ears."

"You're hearing is fine."

"My dad blackmailed you?"

"He's more like your grandpa than he'd like to admit."

Seth whistled softly, trying to digest this new information. He was surprised, but sort of glad that his dad had forced Ryan to come back. If Sandy had gone to Chino and insisted that Ryan return, Ryan would probably still be there. He couldn't take Ryan by physical force, so this was what his father had resorted to. But Seth understood why Ryan was mad.

"They siced the police on me. Not fun. Try having a big burly police dude, who needs to learn the finer points of hygiene, lecture you about how no matter how bad things were at home it wasn't worth running away."

"Serves you right."

"Maybe. But as shitty as it was, Dad was just trying to make sure you came back home. It was the only way he knew how to do it. If he said, 'Ryan come home,' would you have done it?"

Ryan shook his head.

"I didn't think so," continued Seth. "It was the only way he knew how get you back."

"You don't get it, Seth. I can't be here anymore. I've got to help Theresa out. She's in Chino, so I have to be there."

"Your right. I don't get it. I know Theresa is your life long friend. That the two of you go way back. But you're part of our family now and well we don't want to give you up. I couldn't stomach the thought of life here without you. When I was in Catalina, flanked by those two burly smelling police officers, two things were racing through my mind. One of them was that I couldn't go back to Newport and face life without my brother there."

Ryan was quiet for a moment, trying to digest what Seth had said. He looked up from the carpet and asked, "What was the other thing?"

"What?"

Seth looked away, concentrating his gaze on the small television parked on the dresser. He hadn't meant for Ryan to pick up on it. He didn't want to change the subject, but he knew that Ryan wouldn't let him get away without answering the question. "I was thinking that Summer hadn't come to meet me."

"Why would you think that? Why would Summer come to meet you?"

"Because in my note, I asked Summer to meet me in Catalina so that we can sail the rest of the way to Tahiti together. I told her, that the first leg of my trip would be to prepare for her, but that I wanted her to join me. I wanted my trip to be just like I planned. Just like I told you last summer, when we first met."

* * *

Hey all, I know this may seem inconsistent from what I wrote earlier. It will be explained in the next chapter.


	4. Nicotine Break

_Yeah, Josh it isn't mine._

Ryan leaned in, his arms sliding forward on the top of his thighs, glad to have something to talk about that didn't involve him. He also wanted to hear what Seth had to say and was confused, because Seth had led him to believe that Summer was livid with him. Why would she be furious at the invitation to sail to Tahiti with her boyfriend?

"When I asked yesterday, you made out like Summer was royally pissed at you."

"What should I have said? I wasn't going to admit that my girlfriend stood me up. I'd like to keep some of my dignity. It was easier to let everyone believe that I thought she was mad at me. Besides, she is obviously mad at me," Seth propped himself up on his elbows. "Otherwise, why wouldn't she join me?"

Ryan chewed his bottom lip, trying to absorb what he was hearing. "She didn't tell your parents where you were heading," he offered. "Otherwise it wouldn't have taken three days for the police and coast guard to catch up with you. They would have known exactly where you were heading."

"I guess."

"Have you talked to her? Did you try and find out why she didn't come?"

"Obviously she doesn't love me the way I love her."

Seth could be so difficult and stubborn when he wanted, Ryan thought letting out a long sigh. "Call," he insisted.

"If you haven't noticed, my parents put me on house arrest."

Ryan leaned over and picked up the phone. "They won't mind if you call Summer. They'll understand. If they don't, I'll cover."

Seth shook his head vehemently. "I can't."

"Talk to her." He waved the phone in Seth's face. "Find out why she didn't come. Maybe she tried and her father stopped her. Maybe the police caught up with you before she could get there."

Seth titled his head and raised his brows, trying to mimic Ryan's classic look. Ryan thought it was scary that he was beginning to master it.

"It doesn't take that long to get to Catalina. I was waiting for her in the hotel for nearly three days before I ventured back to the Summer Breeze and the cops caught up with me. It's not like it's such a big deal to get to Catalina. They have a ferry every day. She just didn't want to be with me."

"I don't believe that."

"So have you called Marissa?" Seth deliberately changed the subject.

"We're talking about you."

"Usually, I don't mind. Talking about me is a good thing. But right now, I'm not so interested in talking about me."

"Well, I don't want to talk about me."

Seth bit the inside of his cheek. "If we're not talking about me and we're not talking about you what's there left to talk about? Talking about the parents is just… ew!"

Ryan laughed. He got up and slapped Seth on the back. "I'm going to take a shower."

"Good. You smell."

"You're still scrawny man. Watch it."

As the water pelted on his back and slid down his naked legs the good feelings Ryan had slowly ebbed away. In the silence of the bathroom, he realized how much he had missed Seth. It was hard to believe that it had been less than a week from the time he had left Newport for Chino before Sandy had come with guns drawn, ready to drag him back home. Sandy hadn't even given him a chance to make sure he could make it on his own. Maybe he couldn't support a child and girlfriend without a high school diploma, but Sandy hadn't given him the opportunity to try.

He took a few deep breaths, trying to calm the anger that was welling up inside of him. He couldn't think about what Sandy had done. It would only serve to rile him up. Ryan toweled himself dry and threw on a fresh tee shirt and a pair of jeans. He rummaged around his duffel bag, which he hadn't yet unpacked, and found what he was looking for.

Ryan needed some time alone. He needed to forget about Sandy. Grasping the pack of cigarettes he had bought while he was back in Chino, he made his way down the driveway. When he had moved in with the Cohens last year he had given up smoking at Sandy's request. Every so often he grabbed a cigarette, mostly to calm his nerves, but the look on Kirsten's face when she smelled smoke on him— and Kirsten had the uncanny ability to smell cigarettes on him hours after he had puffed on one— made those occurrences less and less frequent. But the first thing he had done back in Chino was to buy a carton.

He leaned against the gate and took a deep drag at the end of the Cohen's driveway.

"Don't let Kirsten catch you."

Ryan didn't even flinch. His eyes slid from the ground up to Sandy's face and then back to the ground. He purposefully took another deep drag off the cigarette, daring his guardian to say anything.

"So, how long am I going to get the silent treatment?" Sandy smoothly took the cigarette from Ryan's mouth, dropped it to the floor, and ground it under his shoe.

Ryan glowered but said nothing.

"We have to move on."

He turned away from Sandy.

"Is it so awful that Kirsten and I wanted you here with us? So awful that you can't look at my face?"

Ryan didn't want to answer. He didn't know what to say. So he kept on looking at the ground and kicked a pebble around with the tip of his shoe. He dug his right hand into his pocket and felt his pack of cigarettes and his lighter. He let his gaze shift up to Sandy, sizing up his foster father and deciding it didn't pay to cross Sandy by taking out another smoke.

"Ryan, you can't ignore me forever."

"It's working for me now." He pushed himself off the gate and started to walk down the street.

Sandy sighed. "I invited Theresa and her mother for dinner tomorrow night."

Ryan stopped and turned slowly. "What for?"

"The five of us have to sit down and talk. If this baby is yours you'll have to take responsibility."

"I thought I was doing that when I moved back to Chino."

"No. You were running away from your home. You're so scared of taking from us that you thought that the best thing for you was to go at this alone. But that's the worse thing you can do for this kid. If it is you kid."

"It doesn't make a difference if it's my kid or not," Ryan spat out. "I don't want it to end up living like I did. No kid should have to grow up like that."

"What makes you think the only way you can prevent that kid from growing up like you is by moving to Chino and throwing away every opportunity you worked your ass off for this year? Why can't you do that if you live here in Newport?'

"Because," Ryan yelled, "Because if I don't stay in Chino Theresa will go back to Eddie. It probably **is** his kid. And he'll sweet talk her and she'll let him convince her to try and make a go at it. My kid or not Sandy, if I can protect him from… from the possible abuse… then I'm going to do my damndest to give this kid hope and save him from the life I had."

Sandy felt like someone was squeezing his heart. Ryan didn't often refer to his past or the abuse he had suffered as a child, so when he did Sandy listened. He wanted to make those years all right, though he knew he couldn't turn back the clock and change things. But what really frightened Sandy was that Ryan was willing to give it all up for a kid that wasn't even his.

"Ryan, I won't let this child—"

Ryan cut him off. "If I'm here, I can't do anything. Not if I'm an hour away. If I'm an hour away this kid will grow up with a part time father at best. Maybe that's better than what I had, no father at all, but would you have been willing to be there for Seth only some of the time?"

Sandy shook his head. "Even so, Ryan, you will only perpetuate the cycle if you divorce yourself from your family. Without a high school diploma you can only make minimum wage. So the two of you will barely be able to cover your living expenses. You'll come home tired and angry. Not to mention how tired a newborn will leave you.

You're only seventeen. You're not emotionally equipped to handle this."

Ryan opened his mouth to say something, but Sandy held up his hand.

"I know you've lived more life than most kids your age. Hell, you lived more than I did when I was your age, but I've been around for a lot longer than you, so I know things. And I'm telling you that to be there for your child, to really be there, emotionally as well as physically, then you need to do this with your family around you.

"You're here to stay. You're not leaving. I can't stop you when you turn eighteen, but there's full year until that happens. Tomorrow Theresa, her mother, Kirsten, you and I will all sit and try and figure this thing out. But I will not let you leave school; give up graduating from Harbor, college or your family.

"Furthermore," Sandy continued not giving up on his tirade, "Your attitude is going to improve." He wagged a finger in Ryan's face. "I will not let you push me away because you're mad. Sometimes parents just do things their kids don't like. Right now, you're mad at me and that's okay. But you will not avoid me."

"Why'd you let me leave in the first place?" Ryan said it so quietly that Sandy barely caught the question. "If you feel so strongly that I should stay, then why did you say it was okay for me to go back to Chino? You could have stopped me last week."

Sandy didn't answer right away. Ryan was glad, because he knew Sandy was searching for an honest answer and not just coming up with some pat line.

"I was taken aback. And when you first told us that you wanted to go back, I thought, I can't stop him. He's not ours. But when I saw what your leaving did to us. Kirsten couldn't stop crying. I was miserable. Seth ran away. I realized then that you were ours. That sometime between August and May you had become our son. And I would never let my son make the colossal mistake you were about to make. So that's why I changed my mind. You don't have to like it. But you have to accept it and move on."

"What if I can't?" He hopped from foot to foot, stretching, tired from standing for such a long time.

"Then I'm going to have to be that parent whose kid hates him. But you're smart Ryan. Before I knew if you were a good person, I knew you were smart. You'll realize that I'm right about this."

Ryan didn't have an answer for Sandy. He was listening to his foster father and was trying to understand Sandy's words, but didn't know what to say.

"Come on. Let's go back in. Kirsten wants me to barbecue for dinner. I'll make Nana's famous sauce."

"I just need to sit here and think."

"Okay. Dinner won't be ready for a half hour at least." Sandy hesitated. "Just hand over your cigarettes." He stretched out his open hand.

Ryan rolled his eyes, but grudgingly gave him the pack. Sandy had just mentioned the Nana, who was starting another round of chemo, and that was enough to guilt Ryan into obeying his guardian.

Sandy took the pack and reluctantly walked back up to the house. He threw a few glances over his shoulders and noticed that Ryan was puffing on something. He shook his head with a rueful smile, realizing that Ryan had somehow slipped at least one cigarette out of the pack before giving it to Sandy. Chuckling to himself, Sandy went to start dinner thinking, _wait until Kirsten smells the smoke on him_.


	5. Slurpee Run

_Now that I've finished_ Downward Spiral _I can concentrate on finishing this fic. I hope you enjoy. The usual disclaimers apply. The one where I lay absolutely no claim to The O.C. or its characters and just wish I did._

Ryan took a deep drag of his cigarette, knowing that when he went back up to the house Kirsten would say something. But he didn't care. What would she do? Ground him? Kick him out? It didn't matter. Ryan didn't think that she known how Sandy intended to drag him back to Newport. But… But… Ryan searched for a reason to be angry with Kirsten and couldn't find one, but at that very moment he was angry with his foster mother too. Even if there was no logical reason for it.

"Hey, Ryan."

He looked up, surprised to see Summer Roberts pulling up in an electric blue Mini Cooper.

"Nice set of wheels." Ryan walked up to the car and rested his hands on the roof and bent down to look into the car. "When did you get them?"

"Yesterday."

"What was the occasion?"

"I didn't have a car. So my dad bought me one."

Ryan poked his head through the open window and studied the interior. "What sort of stereo system to does it have?"

"It's pretty hot. You want to check it out?"

"Sure." He yanked the door open and hopped into the front seat. "Really nice." He fingered the leather seats. "But shouldn't you be showing this to Seth?"

"Cohen's home?"

"Yeah. Isn't that why you came by?"

She shrugged. "I was… you know… just driving by."

"Marissa doesn't live here anymore."

"Coop is a mess. I know it stinks, but I'm just not getting involved with her drama right now. I have my own."

Ryan didn't want to think about what Summer had just said. He couldn't deal with Marissa just yet. So he said, "Seth misses you."

"Then why'd the jerk leave me? With just a note?"

"I thought he invited you to sail to Tahiti with him."

Summer rolled her eyes. She flipped on the stereo and Gavin Degraw filled the tiny vehicle. She angrily tapped the steering wheel, concentrating on the empty street ahead of her.

"You want to go get a slurpee? I need some sugar."

"Okay."

"Do you have to tell the Cohens you're leaving?"

Ryan shrugged. "It doesn't matter." He wasn't so sure that was true. Sandy had been pretty firm before, and he knew that he expected him for dinner, but a sugar rush sounded good since he had smoked his last cigarette for a while. Besides, it sounded like Summer had Seth on her mind and he wanted Seth to be happy. Summer made Seth happy. Maybe he could smooth things over for his foster brother.

"When did you get back to town?"

"Yesterday."

"Are you here to stay?"

"I guess."

"You don't sound too thrilled."

Ryan sighed. "It's not that I don't want to be here. It's just that I need to be in Chino for Theresa."

"You really think it's your kid?"

"No."

"I don't get it."

"I don't get why you're pissed at Seth when he asked you to sail to Tahiti with him."

"He left a note. He wrote, 'I can't stay in Newport without Ryan. I'm sailing to Tahiti this summer on the boat I named for you. Meet me in Catalina tomorrow and we'll do it together.'" She tonelessly recited the note Seth had left her. "Nowhere in the note did he stop to think about my needs. And frankly, while I realize that you coming to live in Newport with the Cohens changed things for Seth, didn't our relationship change things for him too? Wasn't I enough for Seth to stay?"

Ryan chewed on Summer's words. He turned up the volume slightly and stared ahead at the open road. Finally, he said, "You and Seth need to talk. It's hard to say what was in Seth's mind, because well, his train of thought is so difficult to follow, but I think Seth thought that by inviting you along he was showing you how much he loved you. He couldn't stay in Newport, but he couldn't not be around you. Maybe he didn't do it right Summer, but his heart was in the right place. Don't punish him for that. Don't punish yourself for that."

Summer glanced sideways at Ryan and then hung a sharp left into the Seven Eleven parking lot. "He loves me?"

"Without a doubt Summer. He's bummed because he thinks you don't love him back."

She sighed. "I really need that sugar."

They went into the store. Ryan watched Summer take the largest cup and fill it with a mixture of cherry, grape and cola flavors.

"That's just disgusting."

"Taste it before you judge." She waved the oversized cup in his face.

"No way."

She took a long sip. "Yum. Don't bash it until you taste it."

"I'll pass."

"Chicken."

"Who're you calling chicken?"

"You Chino." She held out the cup again.

He grabbed it out of her hand, smirked, and took a sip from the straw. Summer watched his expression change from skepticism to surprise.

"It's good."

"Told you."

"Who would have thunk it?"

"You have to have a little more faith Chino."

He watched as she swaggered to the counter, her ass swaying, making his pants go tight. Quickly, he turned to the slurpee machine and filled a cup for himself, hoping the proximity to the cold drinks would get rid of the bulge in his pants. This was his best friend's girlfriend. Not to mention that he had a girlfriend, albeit a rather messed up girlfriend, and there was a girl he had possibly impregnated back in Chino. He wondered if complicated was tattooed to his ass.

"Chino, you coming?" Summer called.

He wished Summer would stop calling him Chino. Ryan went to pay. He put the cup onto the counter and asked for a pack of Marlboros. He knew he had more smokes in his room, but he wouldn't get at them for a while and he wanted to smoke another before he faced the Cohens again.

"You have to be eighteen. You have some ID?" The clerk pointed to the sign that said "Under 18 no tobacco. We card."

Ryan groaned. The same signs were all over the stores in Chino. No one bothered to card him in Chino. "Just the slurpee then."

"What's with the smoking," Summer asked when they were back in the car. "Don't the Cohens have a thing against it? I mean the Nana has lung cancer, right?"

"It calms my nerves."

"You don't seem happy to be back in Newport."

He shrugged. "It's complicated."

"Why'd you come back?"

"Sandy made me. It's weird." Ryan leaned against the headrest. "When I beat up Oliver, Sandy came in to tell me that Dr. Kim had suspended me. He tried to get me to talk and I wasn't talking. At least, Sandy wasn't listening."

"That was pretty messed up time."

Ryan nodded. "Sandy said he couldn't keep me there. That if I wanted I could walk out. But if I wanted to stay I was pretty much grounded."

"What a choice."

Ryan laughed, suddenly realizing how bizarre it sounded, especially when he added, "I chose being grounded. But last week Sandy let me go. Then he suddenly changed his mind and told me I had to come back. I mean he gave me an ultimatum between jail and Newport."

Summer whistled under her breath. "Sandy and Kirsten must have realized how much they loved you to do that. They must have realized how they didn't want to continue without you in their lives."

"So you think what they did was okay?"

"Oh, I'd be pissed if my dad did that. But well, aren't you glad that someone cares enough about you to do that. From what Seth told me—" Summer paused and cast a sideways glance at Ryan, looking to see if he would be mad or annoyed that she and Seth talked about him when he wasn't around, especially about his personal life. But Ryan didn't look upset. "From what Seth told me you didn't have anyone who really cared about you before you came to Newport."

"I guess I didn't. But—"

"No buts Ryan. They care about you. Bottom line. Listen, if I have to give Seth a chance and talk to him, then you have to give the Cohens a chance and listen to them."

Ryan didn't answer. When he stopped to really think about it, he was glad that someone was looking out for him. He just didn't know how to reconcile that with his feeling of total responsibility for Theresa.

"So you're going to listen?" She asked as she pulled into the Cohen's driveway.

"I won't have a choice. I reek of smoke and I'm late for dinner and I'm bound to be in for a lecture."

"Well, good luck then."

Ryan got out of the car, but looked back at Summer. "You should drop by later on. While I'm being reamed out, Seth will be eavesdropping, because well that's what he does, but he can't do anything else while he's grounded. He really wants to talk to you Summer."

"I'll be by later." She waved and sped off, leaving Ryan to face the Cohens on his own.

When he walked into the kitchen, Kirsten, Sandy and Seth were seated around the table eating supper quietly. A place was set for him, conspicuously empty. Ryan mumbled an apology and sat down. He caught Kirsten's glare as she passed him the chicken, even though she didn't say a word. He looked down at his plate, concentrating on the china pattern.

Kirsten sniffed loudly. "Were you smoking? It smells like smoke."

Ryan's eyes snapped up. He opened his mouth, about to deny it, when his gaze met Sandy. "Sandy already took away my pack," he said conveniently leaving out the fact that he had palmed one or that he had half a carton stashed in his duffel bag. He liked to smoke. Sometimes he needed to smoke. And if he was going to live in Newport, an hour away from his maybe child and its mother, he was going to need them even more.

Kirsten nodded, instead choosing to start grilling Seth, asking him if he was planning on getting a job during the summer.

"Can I?"

"I'd like you to. You can't sit around all day. Ryan will be working at the Newport Group. I can find you something to do there."

"Uh. No thanks."

"How about my office then?" Sandy asked.

"Actually, I'd like to see if the comic book store could use some help. Maybe I can give some sailing lessons."

"No sailing lessons." Sandy pointed his finger at Seth. "You're lucky we're not selling your boat."

"Okay. No sailing lessons." He stabbed his food with his fork. "So, Ryan. You're going to start working in the bowels of hell?"

"Seth!"

"What?"

"Eat your dinner," Kirsten demanded with an exasperated sigh.

"I am."

His mother shot him a dirty look. Seth just looked down at his plate and concentrated on his food. The rest of the dinner was silent.

Ryan rolled over, slamming the snooze button on his alarm. He curled up, scrunching his pillow under his head. _One more minute_, he thought. _Then I'll get ready for my first day of work_. He snuggled under his covers, until he heard a light knock and the door creaking open.

"Ryan. Are you up? We have to leave here in about forty minutes."

Ryan rolled over. "I'm up."

"Okay. I'll see you in a bit. I'll put on some coffee."

Thirty minutes later, Ryan was showered and dressed. He grabbed a mug and filled it with coffee, took a box of cereal out of the cabinet and started munching right out of the box.

"There's enough time for you to pour a bowl and eat like a _mensch_."

"What's that?" He put another handful of Captain Crunch in his mouth.

"It's Yiddish for man. It usually denotes a decent man." She put a bowl in front him. "I learned that from Nana Cohen."

Ryan smiled and poured the cereal in the bowl.

"Ryan." Kirsten's voice was hesitant. "Are you planning on wearing that to work?"

He looked down at his jeans, wifebeater and button down shirt. "Yeah. Is something wrong?"

"Um, it's a bit casual for the office. Why don't you go back upstairs and put on your black chinos. If you button up this shirt and grab a tie, you'll be fine."

"A tie?"

"It's an office Ryan."

"I didn't know I would have to wear a tie."

"First impressions." Kirsten glanced at her watch. "We don't have a lot of time."

As soon as he came down the stairs Kirsten was hustling him into the front seat of the Rover, quickly glancing at him to make sure she approved of his attire. The first few minutes of the drive were quiet, except for the low rumble of the newscaster's voice as Kirsten listened for the traffic report.

"I'm sorry about last night. About being late for Dinner." He fidgeted with the tie that was choking him.

"Okay."

Ryan tried not to be surprised that she didn't say it was fine. That's what he expected her to say. Instead, she was simply accepting his apology as if that's what she had expected of him.

"I should have called."

"You should have been there on time. Or told us where you were going. I sent out Seth to get you. Then Sandy. I even went looking myself and I was worried Ryan. We were worried. You didn't consider how we would feel when we didn't know where you were."

Kirsten recalled Sandy's arms around her, reassuring her that Ryan would return to them. "Let's just sit down for dinner," he had said. "He'll show up soon enough. He'll get hungry." And he had been right.

"I'm sorry," he repeated.

"I know this is tough for you, but we really have to work together at this family thing."

"You've been a family for a long time… without me."

"You were doing a pretty good job at it until now." She reached over and squeezed his knee. "I'm not mad. I was more worried than mad. And I just needed you to know it."

She pulled into the parking lot of the Newport Group and pulled into a spot, which had a sign "Reserved for Kirsten Cohen." She parked and asked, "Ready?"

"I guess." He tried not to show how nervous he really was. He hoped to God that he didn't embarrass Kirsten and make her regret her decision to let him work at the Newport Group.


	6. The First Day on the Job

_Usual disclaimers apply_

* * *

"Kyle, this is Ryan. He'll be working here this summer."

Kirsten guided Ryan by the elbow into the large room open room. He resisted the urge to shake her off, knowing it was just her motherly instincts. There was a long conference table in middle of the room and a few drafting tables were pushed against the walls. But shelves stacked with large rolls of unruly paper occupied most of the wall space. There were many more rolls scattered on the tables, giving the room a look of disarray. It was so unlike Kirsten who needed everything neat, perfect and in place.

"I know I didn't give you any warning, but," she surveyed the room, "But I know you need the help here and in the past Ryan has expressed and interest in architecture. I thought this would be a good place for him to get his feet wet."

"Sure, no problem, Mrs. Cohen. There's always something to do here." Kyle didn't look embarrassed that his office was a complete mess. "Ryan can jump right in."

Kirsten smiled. "I knew I could count on you. I'll see you later." She waved and turned to leave.

As soon as she was out of sight, Kyle turned to face Ryan. "So you know Mrs. Cohen for long?"

Ryan shrugged. He had been grateful that Kirsten hadn't explained who he was and he wasn't about to blow his anonymity. He'd be better off if people didn't know he was the boss's foster son.

"I was surprised to see her back. You being new here, you're obviously out of the loop. The entire office has been abuzz since her dad, Mr. Nichol, tied the knot. Apparently, both her kids ran away after the wedding. One took off to Tahiti on a sail boat and the other went to take care of some girl he knocked up."

Ryan focused on the corner of the desk, trying not to show any interest in Kyle's gossip. But that didn't dissuade the other man.

"She hasn't been at work since the wedding. But I guess she had to come back sometime. Wonder how her kids are. Anyway," Kyle turned back to his desk. "We should get you to work. No point in angering the boss. It's not often that she comes down here."

For the next ten minutes Kyle proceeded to explain that this was where they kept the plans for every project the Newport Group was part of. He said that the original plans weren't stored in this office they just had copies. But there were times the projects overlapped, or someone whether it was the architect, the developers, or contractors wanted to refer to a past project. It was their job to keep it all in order and to be able to pull up plans at a moment's notice.

"My staff was cut by half and it's been nearly impossible to keep up."

"How many people did you have here?" It was Ryan's first question during Kyle's long-winded explanation.

"Including me… two."

Ryan laughed. "Well, your staff has been restored for the summer. Just put me to work."

"It's not exciting. A lot of filing." He walked to the back of the room where one of the shelves was a complete jumble. "You didn't tell me how you knew Mrs. Cohen. The Newport Group doesn't usually hire teenagers. So who did you have to sleep with?"

Ryan's face flushed a deep red.

"Come on," urged Kyle, oblivious to Ryan's discomfort. "You can tell me."

"Can we just get to work?" Ryan tried to keep the edge out of his voice. He didn't need to make enemies on his first day of work. Otherwise it would be a very long summer. And it looked like it would be just him and Kyle, in the bowels of hell as Seth had put it.

"Sure…"

For the next hour Kyle showed Ryan what to do and they companionably worked side by side. Music played in the background. It wasn't emo music or punk, which Seth and Marissa preferred and Ryan had gotten used to during the year, but oldies. Actually, it reminded him of the music Sandy and Kirsten listened to when they were trying to torture him and Seth in the guise of giving them a fine musical education.

Kyle prattled on, divulging his entire history. Ryan listened with interest. He was glad to listen to Kyle. Glad the other man wasn't asking him too many questions he didn't want to answer. But as soon as the phone rang, that all changed.

The shrill ring jostled Ryan out of his reverie. He heard Kyle say, "He's doing great Mrs. Cohen. He's right here. I'll get him on the phone."

Ryan took the phone, hoping his face wasn't as red as it felt. He couldn't believe Kirsten was checking up on him, like he was in Kindergarten. He took a deep breath and put the phone by his ear.

"Hey."

"Hi Ryan. How's it going?"

"Okay."

Kirsten tried not to sigh at her end of the line, reminding herself that Ryan's verbal skills would probably never improve. He was just a quiet personality.

"I just got off the phone with Sandy. He's coming over for lunch. Would you like to join us? He's in the mood for crab cakes. I was going to order from the Crab Shack."

"Oh. Okay. Sure."

"So what should I order?"

"Um. A cheese burger."

"Fries and a milkshake too?"

"Yeah. Thanks. That sounds great."

"Okay. Good. Come up to my office in an hour.

Kyle was looking at him curiously as Ryan hung up the phone. "You know, I kept thinking there was something familiar about you! Now I get it. You're her kid. Aren't you? I saw you at the Holiday Party last year."

Ryan looked at his shoes. Maybe he should have just told Kyle who he was right away. "The Cohens are my guardians."

"Right." He hit his forehead with the palm of his hands. "Right. I remember the grapevine now. You're the kid they took in after you burned down the model home."

"Yeah. Um. Yes. That's me."

"So which one of the kids are you?" Kyle asked, not letting the topic go, even though Ryan's eyes were pleading. "Are you the one who knocked up the girl or the one who ran to Tahiti?"

Ryan turned his back to Kyle and started to neatly stack the plans. He knew he couldn't avoid answering Kyle's question, so he finally said, "I went back home to Chino. But the Cohens made me come back."

"To live with your girlfriend," Kyle said knowingly. "So you've got a kid on the way."

Maybe, thought Ryan. "Can we not talk about it? I really don't want to talk about it." Ryan's voice was razor sharp.

"Yeah. Sure. I get it. Sorry."

For the next hour, they continued to work silently, with only the music in the background. When it was time, Ryan went up to find Kirsten's office. He had to ask someone how to get there, but he finally found it. The door to the office was open, but Kirsten was on the phone. He stood quietly, waiting for her to notice him. She did after a moment and smiled, waving for him to come in with her free hand.

"Look," she was saying. "These complications are nothing new. They're the same ole' same ole. So someone has got to get their a—" She looked up and remembered Ryan. "Butt in gear and just take care of it. I want progress by the end of the week. Okay, bye," she said after a brief pause. "I'll speak to you tomorrow."

"Nice office," he said.

"Thanks. Sorry about that. Can you give me just one more minute?" She jumped up from the desk. "I must go use the restroom."

Kirsten ran out of the room leaving Ryan alone in her office. He walked around looking over the framed sketches on the wall. He noticed the photo they had taken at Chrismukah, the four of them in front of the fireplace sitting on one of the end tables. There were more photos. Kirsten and Sandy at the beach, the wind blowing through their hair. There was a picture of a six-year-old Seth on a shiny red tricycle and two front teeth missing. Seth at twelve leaning against the pool house holding a skateboard. Then there was a picture that Ryan didn't remember taking. It was of him and Seth dressed in tuxedos. He stared at the picture and wondered which function it was from. There was one more photo of Ryan, eyes squinting in the sun, in a muddied soccer uniform. It had been after his first game and Kirsten had insisted on taking the picture, much to his embarrassment. He looked away from the pictures, trying not to think about what it meant that his pictures were in her office.

He walked around to her desk to check out her computer. He ran his fingers over the keyboard and the screen came alive. He quickly averted his eyes, thinking it might be confidential information he had no business looking at. A computer printout with bright bold colors caught his eyes. "Raising Kids Who Don't Smoke." He felt a twinge in his stomach. Kirsten wasn't printing out the brochure to stop Seth from smoking.

"Hey kid."

Ryan jumped. "Hey." He smiled at Sandy. "Let me help you with that." He took the large brown paper bag from Sandy and set it on the conference table.

"You hungry?"

"A little."

"Where's Kirsten?"

"Restroom."

"Hey guys. Sorry to keep you waiting." Kirsten breezed into the room, the hem of her jacket flying behind her. "I'm famished. What did you surprise me with?" She pawed through the brown paper bag.

Sandy laughed. "I knew it! You always do this. Oh just bring me a salad," he said, using a high-pitched voice that was supposed to mimic Kirsten. "That'll be fine." He threw a hand over Ryan's shoulder and tried not to notice that Ryan tensed. "Kid, when a lady tells you to just bring her a salad, just play it safe. Buy an extra burger or something." He walked over to the bag and helped Kirsten unpack. "I learned the hard way. Now, when Kirsten says salad for lunch, I always get something else, just in case. Otherwise, I walk away hungry."

Ryan's lips curled up into a smile.

"That's not fair. I wasn't hungry when you called."

"You always say that."

Kirsten shook her head, trying not to laugh. "Ryan, eat before your food gets cold."

He sat, because he was really more than a little hungry. Especially now that the scent of the cheeseburger and fries were permeating the office. He ate his burger slowly, alternating bites with fries and sips of his milkshake. He didn't feel the need to talk. He just wanted to relish in the company of Sandy and Kirsten. These were the moments he always enjoyed in the Cohen household, the banter back and forth between Sandy and Kirsten, or Seth and Sandy or any combination of Cohens. They were always at ease with each other, comfortable with one another's company, never afraid to talk. Good-natured teasing was just a natural part of their lives and they weren't afraid that their jokes would be misinterpreted and rewarded with a punch to the gut or a slap across the face.

"So Ryan how's the job?"

He took a long sip of the shake, trying to avoid answering Sandy's question. But Sandy and Kirsten just waited patiently for an answer.

"It's okay," he finally said. "Uh. Kyle figured out that I live with you." He said this more the Kirsten than to Sandy.

"Was it supposed to be a secret?"

Ryan shook his head. He didn't really know. She hadn't said anything to begin with, so he hadn't known how to proceed when Kyle had put it all together.

"Does it make you uncomfortable?" Sandy asked.

"No." Ryan lied.

"So Kyle knows you're our son. Big deal. What's the worst that can happen? You get some preferential treatment?"

"I don't want any."

"And you won't get any. Don't let Kyle fool you," Kirsten said. "He's a slave driver. He'll work you for everything you've got." Finished with this topic, Kirsten turned to her husband and said, "Did you remember to call Rosa and remind her about dinner tonight?"

"Yes. And I gave Seth permission to go out with Summer tonight. A one night reprieve." Sandy held up his hand, stopping Kirsten's protest. "So he can work things out with his girlfriend while we talk with Theresa and her mother without him eavesdropping."

Ryan watched Kirsten suppress a disapproving look. Secretly, he was glad that Seth wouldn't be in the house. He was even gladder that Seth and Summer would be working things out. He liked her even more after his talk with her the night before. She was a good friend to him and an even better girl friend to Seth. H just wanted Seth to be happy. He wasn't sure how his love life would pan out. He'd been back in Newport for three days and he hadn't tried to call Marissa.

"Ryan, is there anything special you'd like Rosa to make?"

He shook the thoughts from his head and focused on Kirsten's words. "No. Anything is fine."

After that the lunch hour passed quickly. Ryan went back to work. Kyle seemed to have forgotten the earlier awkwardness and the rest of the afternoon flew by. Before Ryan knew it, Kirsten was calling him on the phone to meet her in the parking lot or they would be late for dinner.

Ryan went straight to his room to shower and change. Not that he got hot and sweaty moving around rolls of paper all day. It was nothing like working construction or waiting tables. He hoped it would get more interesting, but for now he wouldn't say anything to Kirsten. He didn't want her any more upset at him than she already was.

He was pulling on his boots when Kirsten knocked on his door to tell him that Theresa and her mother had arrived.


	7. The Dinner

_This is the third version of this chapter. I know it's short, but it ended where it had to end. Hope you all enjoy. And as usual... I own nothing except my car (and a computer and a laptop).

* * *

_

Sandy got right to the point. They were all sitting at dinner, with plates full of food. Rosa had prepared a feast of roast, sweet potato wedges, and Ryan's favorite squash salad. But Ryan barely had time to chew his first piece of meat when Sandy brought up the pregnancy.

Not that Ryan minded. His stomach was in knots, and he really had no room for the food he was chewing. And when he had hugged Theresa he thought he felt a small bulge in her belly. He didn't know if he was feeling the baby, but he guessed it was soon enough to start showing. Not talking about why they were here would be like ignoring the pink elephant in the room. He was glad Sandy didn't beat around the bush.

"The first issue at hand is the paternity of this child. It's not fair to make any decisions, until we know if this is truly Ryan's baby."

There was a gasp across from Ryan, and his head jerked up to see Eva put a hand to her mouth. And it felt like someone had punched him in the gut.

"Theresa." Eva's voice was shaky. She turned to her daughter with a hard look. It was a look Ryan recognized. It was just like the look Sandy gave him when he was in trouble or said something out of line and nothing like the looks he had gotten from his father or A.J. or any of the other boyfriends. "Theresa," Eva repeated. "What is Mr. Cohen talking about?"

And suddenly the color drained from Sandy's face as he realized Eva didn't know as much as they did.

"Mama. I… The baby…" Theresa couldn't finish.

"The baby could be Eddie's." Kirsten finished for her.

Eva shook her head, looking at her daughter like she was a stranger. The Cohens and Ryan were silent; not wanting to interrupt what should have been a private moment.

"You told me that you and Eddie were waiting until you were married."

"I know, Mama. I'm sorry. I lied." Theresa looked down at her hands, which rested in her lap. She looked like a small child being scolded by her mother. "I knew you would be upset."

"You told me Ryan was the only one." Ryan could hear Eva keeping careful control of her voice. He noticed Sandy and Kirsten shooting each other bewildered looks from across the table. They had not anticipated this drama when they had invited Eva and Theresa for dinner.

"Mama. I didn't want you to think any less of me than you already did. It was hard enough telling you I was pregnant. I couldn't tell you that I wasn't even sure of the baby's father."

"This is not the girl I raised." Eva was shaking her head vehemently. "This is not the person I wanted you to become."

"Eva," Kirsten said softly. "Theresa wasn't with Ryan and Eddie at the same time. She and Eddie had broken up, because Theresa was unsure of her relationship with Eddie. I know that we wish our children would choose to wait until marriage, but unfortunately today that's just not everyone's reality."

Eva closed her eyes.

"Mama. I'm sorry."

"So you dragged Ryan back to Chino. Made him give up all of this wonderful goodness." She waved her hand the room. "And you weren't even sure if it's Ryan's baby. How could you?"

"It was my choice, Eva. Theresa didn't make me do anything. Even if the baby is Eddie's I want to be in its life."

"Listen to me, young man." Eva pointed a finger at Ryan. "If this is your child, that's one thing. But if this is Eddie's child, I will not let you throw all this opportunity away for another man's child."

"Eva–"

"Don't you Eva me, Ryan Atwood. These good people practically rescued you from the hellhole you called a home. You will not give it up for another man's child."

Kirsten covered her mouth with her hands, covering the smile that was tugging at her lips. Ryan looked miserable. The same way he looked anytime she or Sandy came down on him for misbehaving. And Eva looked like a force to be reckoned with. She wondered how often Ryan had to answer to her while growing up.

Sandy pointed a withering look at his wife. "Eva, we first need to determine if this is Ryan's baby. We're not letting Ryan go. We almost made that mistake."

"Then there's nothing to talk about until the baby is born," said Ryan. "We're not going to endanger the baby so that we can make the next few months easier."

"No, we're not going to endanger the baby or Theresa for the sake of a paternity test. But I've been doing some research and as it turns out there are non-invasive prenatal paternity tests."

"I've been in touch with my doctor," continued Kirsten. "She can set up a test as early as tomorrow if you'll allow it."

"Theresa, you don't have to do this." The words slipped out of Ryan's mouth before he could think about it. Had he thought about it, perhaps he could have gauged the reaction of all the adults around him.

"Why on earth not?" exploded Sandy. "There's no reason to drag this through the mud for six more months while we wait for this baby to be born. It's a simple blood test."

"It's okay, Mr. Cohen. I'll take the blood test."

"We'll incur all costs," assured Kirsten.

"Thank you."

"Then what?" Ryan asked petulantly, leaning back against his chair, and clenching his fists in his laps. "If it's not my baby, do you just expect me to forget about this?"

"We'll cross that road when we come to it."

"I thought we were here to discuss it."

"Ryan, please."

He turned to Kirsten. "I have a responsibility to this child. I'm not just going to forget it because a blood test shows that it's not mine."

"Enough, Ryan. You're seventeen-years-old. You're still a child yourself."

"I haven't been a child for years. Not since my father was put in jail and Dawn started with her string of boyfriends. I know you mean well, but you can't rewrite my history."

"We're not trying to."

"Yes you are, Kirsten. I know that last summer when we first met that I told you I just wanted to be a kid. And it's true. And living here with you guys has given me the chance to just go to school and hang out without worrying about who was coming home or if my mom would drink away the rent money. But I am who I am. And I'm not Seth. In some ways, I'm way older than Seth."

Kirsten arranged her forks and knife neatly around her plate. She refused to meet Ryan's gaze. Sandy was leaning forward, elbows on the table, his plate pushed away letting the food get cold. Neither knew how to answer Ryan. They were trying to give him the chance to be a kid. But maybe Dawn had made that impossible. Maybe it was just their job to keep him safe until he eighteen and it was legal for him to be out on his own. But to Kirsten that was unthinkable. He had become so much more to her than just the juvenile delinquent, the boy from Chino or the boy in the pool house. He was part of her family now and when he turned eighteen she wanted to make sure he came back to them.

It was Eva who finally spoke up. "I lived next door to you for how long? Eight- nine years?"

"Nine," Ryan clarified in a soft voice.

"It wasn't like I didn't see what things were like. I knew. And maybe I should have done more."

"I know you tried to help mom. She's a lost cause."

"Maybe. But you are not. And with everything you had to live, it's not surprising that you think of yourself as an adult. But you're not. You're just a child living with adult responsibilities. You finally have a chance to throw away all those responsibilities, why would you want to saddle yourself with more adult obligations before you have to? A child is a lot to handle."

"Because I love Theresa. I always have." He didn't say that he loved her as a friend. A friend that came with benefits. "Eddie is abusive. And I don't want him to have the chance to do to a child…" He couldn't finish. He was tired of telling everyone that he had been abused. It was no secret. There was probably a file an inch think sitting with child services. Sandy probably even had a copy.

"Ryan if it means that much to you, then we won't press the paternity test. We'll just continue discussing your options as if it were your child."

Ryan turned his eyes wide. He hadn't expected Sandy to give in. He had seemed so adamant about finding out the paternity of this baby, that Ryan thought he'd be talking until he was blue in the face. Some of the knots in his stomach loosened and for the first time since they had sat down for dinner Ryan thought he could breathe a little easier.

Then Theresa said, "But I want the paternity test."


	8. Tresspassing

_Thanks for all the wonderful reviews. Besides the usual disclaimer where I claim to own nothing, I'd like to add that I know nothing... that is about real legal matters and it may show up here... You'll see what I'm talking about._

* * *

Seth thought Summer looked intoxicating. Her hair cascaded past her shoulders in little waves and she was wearing just enough to cover up, but not enough to stop the desire from swelling in his pants. He knew she had done it on purpose, chosen the exact outfit that would make him go wild with desire, so that he would grovel at her feet and beg forgiveness, but Seth wasn't sure he was the only one who needed forgiving. He had left, but Summer hadn't come.

They drove in silence, Summer's music playing quietly in the background. It wasn't his type of music, but he and Summer had long ago agreed to disagree on their listening preferences. They were so different, he thought for the umpteenth time that year, how was it possible to save this relationship? But Seth knew he had to save it somehow. Ryan was back in Newport, but his life wouldn't be the same or complete unless Summer was part of it.

"Where to?" she asked.

Seth shrugged. "The beach? The docks?"

"Okay."

"Summer—"

She reached over and raised the volume on the stereo. "I'm sorry Seth. I thought I could do this. But I can't."

"You can't what?"

"It's harder than I thought. Spending time with you."

"But we have to talk to figure things out."

"I know."

"And besides. My parents don't want me home tonight."

Summer laughed.

He had missed her laugh. He knew that it had only been a little over a week since they had spent time together, but he missed everything about her anyway. Summer was everything and more than the crush that he had built up over the years. She was sweet and tender and smart and funny. She was rich and spoiled and God, sometimes that frustrated him. But he loved her and didn't want to lose her and Seth didn't know how to make things all right again.

"So which is it, the beach or the docks?"

"Revisit the scene of the crime?" Summer turned her head briefly, but Seth didn't miss the grin.

He shrugged. "Maybe there I can make you understand. Maybe you can help me understand."

"Okay."

Seth let out his breath, though he hadn't realized he was holding it. Maybe they could talk and work it out. Maybe being close to the Summer Breeze Seth could find the words to make her understand how sorry he was and how hurt he was at the same time. Maybe she could find the words to make him understand why she hadn't come.

Seth had waited for Summer once he had arrived at Catalina. He had checked into an inn on the island using his grandfather's credit card. He knew his parents would track his card the minute they noticed he was missing, and he wasn't sure how long it would take them to figure out he had left using the Summer Breeze. He was careful not to leave any details in his note. He just told them he loved them, but that he couldn't stay in Newport. Not without Ryan. But he had told Summer his plan and asked her to join him. He couldn't stay in Newport, but he couldn't be without her. After three days he realized she wasn't coming and that was why he had set out for the dock to check out his boat. And that was when the cops had found him.

Summer pulled into the parking lot near the docks. She paused before pulling out the keys into the ignition.

"Ready?" he asked.

"Yeah. I'm ready."

They were both surprised to find the gate locked.

"It's never locked." He scratched his head.

"Should we try something else?"

"I don't know." He walked down the road, following the gate. "It's not so high here. We can just climb over." It wasn't really a gate at this point, just a guardrail that reached Seth's knee.

"Should we?"

"Why not?"

"I don't know. It's locked. Doesn't that mean we should stay out?"

"It's the docks. My boat is there. Why shouldn't I be able to get in?"

"Okay, let's go."

They stepped over the rail and Seth guided Summer to his boat. He stepped inside and held out his hand to help her in, but she shook her head.

"That thing won't hold the both of us." She sat down on the edge of the dock and let her feet dangle above the water.

"Is that why you didn't come? You were afraid to sail with me in this little thing? Or were you just afraid of being with me?"

"It wasn't like that Cohen."

"Then what was it like? I waited for you!" He didn't shout the words, but said it quietly, under his breath.

"Why couldn't you stay Cohen? I know that Ryan's like your best friend. Your brother. And I get that you didn't want to stay in Newport without him, but what about me? Why wasn't I enough?" There, thought Summer, she had finally said it to his face. She clutched the edge of the dock so hard that she could feel splinters digging into her skin.

Seth stepped out of his boat and sat down next to her, his long legs dangling, and the tips of his shoes touched the water. He inched closer to Summer so his hip was touching hers.

"I needed to get away. I'd hoped you would understand."

"Were you planning to come back?"

"I don't know. I really didn't think. Summer—" He took a deep breath. "You know I've had a crush on you since like third grade. I told you that."

"I know. I thought it was sweet."

"Once we started high school, I was miserable. No one talked to me. One of the only outlets I had was sailing and so I concocted a plan in my head." He looked down at his hands. "I planned a sailing trip to Tahiti. I was going to do it this summer. I never planned to go alone."

"Who were you going to take? I mean, you didn't know Ryan yet, did you?"

He shook his head. "I was planning on taking you."

"Me?"

"I told you Summer. For me, it's always and only been you."

"I… Cohen… I couldn't come." She leaned her head on his shoulder. "My father wouldn't understand. And frankly, I was pissed at you. I knew that you were upset about Ryan —"

"And I should have stayed for you. So we both screwed up."

They sat side by side, with Summer's head on his shoulder, not saying a word. Neither was sure how to make it right, but both knew that they had to find a way. Seth squinted when a light was pointed in his eyes.

"What are you doing here?" a gruff voice asked.

Seth held his hand over his eyes, trying to see the face behind the flashlight. He could feel Summer tense up beside him.

"Um… visiting my boat… who are you?"

"I need to see some identification."

"Not until I know who I'm talking to." Summer wrapped her hand Seth's upper arm in a death grip. "Owe. Summer, that hurts."

The man in front of them pointed the flashlight at himself so Seth could see his uniform. It was a police officer.

* * *

For a moment Ryan was speechless. His mouth dropped open. He couldn't believe that he had gotten Sandy to finally see his way and now Theresa was going to shoot it all to hell. What on earth was she thinking? He pushed his chair back, not at all being careful that it didn't scrape the parquet floor. He was usually so careful with the Cohens' things.

"Can Theresa and I have a moment alone?" he asked in an even voice. He looked to Sandy for approval. Sandy nodded once and so Ryan turned to Theresa with a pointed look. "Let's go out front," he said.

He was surprised that it was already dark outside, so he stepped back into the foyer and flipped a switch and the driveway flooded with lights. He saw Theresa digging into her jeans and she pulled out a pack of Marlboros and a lighter.

"You want one?" she asked.

He took it gratefully, used her lighter and inhaled deeply before he said, "Hey, why are you still smoking? It's not good for the baby." She almost had the cigarette to her lips, but Ryan plucked it from her fingers and threw it to the pavement, grinding the light out with the heel of his boots.

"The second-hand smoke is just as unhealthy."

He glowered at her, but stubbed it out anyway. "Why do you want the test?" he finally asked.

"Because I want to know whose child I'm carrying."

"It doesn't matter Theresa. I'll do right by it no matter what."

She looked to the floor and kicked a pebble with her foot. Her long black hair fell over her face so that Ryan couldn't read her expression.

"Ryan, they were right in there. I'm only seventeen. We're just kids."

"Kids or not, we're having a child."

"Well who said I want it?" She was shouting.

Ryan threw up his hands. "You're the one who decided against the abortion."

"It's not my only choice."

"What do you mean?"

"Atwood, sometimes you are so thick. I can give this baby up for adoption."

He shook his head vehemently. "You can't do that! How do you know the kid won't get some crap set of parents? At least we know who we are. And we have people who are willing to help us out." He waved his hands at the house, though he wasn't sure how much Sandy and Kirsten wanted to help him raise a child. It seemed to him that they wanted him to give up the responsibility and just go on with his life as if none of this ever happened..

"That's why I want the paternity test Ryan. If it's not your baby, you have no say in the matter."

"The hell I don't."

"You don't even believe it's yours. You never did. You came to Chino out of some sense of obligation. I saw it all over your face. And as pissed as you are or were with Mr. Cohen for dragging you back to Newport, I know that you were glad deep down inside."

"I wanted to do what was right."

"Well, giving this kid a set of parents who can't even vote is not what's right for this kid. The Cohens said they'd pay for a paternity test and I want to do this Ryan."

"What if I don't agree to it? Are you going to tell Eddie you're pregnant and ask him for a sample of his DNA?"

"You don't mean that, Ryan."

"Maybe I do."

"Why are you being such an asshole?"

Ryan sank down on the steps. He didn't know how to answer. He couldn't explain what this baby meant to him. It was a chance to give a kid the opportunity to grow up safe and secure. To feel loved. All the things he had lacked as a child. Why was it that everyone else couldn't see that? Why was it that he had to paint a picture for them?

"I want this kid, Theresa. Whether it's Eddie's or mine. If you don't want it fine. You can give it up and I'll take care of it."

"You're nuts Atwood. It's a baby we're talking about. A child. It's not a hamster. And if I'm not mistaken you killed a couple of those in your time."

He sneered at her. "I did not kill my hamsters. It was their time to go."

"Yeah. After you let them out of their cage."

He rolled his eyes. "Do we have to rehash this? It's been like seven years and I was ten. I wanted to clean the cage. I didn't know what I was doing."

"So what makes you so sure you'll know what to do with a baby? You know which end to diaper? What to do when it cries? What happens if it gets sick or what about all the stuff that comes later? Like when it starts to walk and talk. Are you going to finish school? How are you going to support it? Have you really thought about this Ryan?"

"Not as much as you have, I guess."

"Because this is a lot more real to me than it is to you. It's growing inside of me. I want that paternity test. Then we can think of what's next."

"If it is Eddie's baby you're going to give it up, aren't you?"

She nodded her head. "Yeah. Probably. After we get the results of the test, I'm going to sell my car and go to Atlanta to live with my cousin until the baby is born. I'll find a couple to adopt the baby. Lots of couples look for babies to adopt and they would pay all my medical expenses…"

"You've done your research."

She nodded.

"When? I mean, when were you planning on telling me about this, because clearly this was not a decision made overnight."

"I decided when I saw how miserable you were being back in Chino."

* * *

"So officer," Seth said, trying to hide the quaver in his voice. "It's ID you want to see."

The officer cocked his brow and tilted his head, making Seth think of Ryan. He was glad Ryan wasn't around, because he wasn't sure how much trouble he was in, but if Ryan were there, then whatever this was about could blow his probation.

"I don't get it." Summer handed her license to the cop. "What's this all about?"

"You're trespassing."

"Excuse me," Seth spluttered.

"Did you not notice the locked gate?"

"Yeah. But this is my boat. I rent space here."

"But the gate was locked. Stay put," he ordered. I'm going to run your names through my computer."

"Shit." Seth put his head in his hands. "I'm sorry, Summer. I didn't think."

"It's okay. It's not like they're going to arrest us."

"Oh God." He took deep breaths, because the image of him calling his dad from jail just popped into his head. "He better not."

"Cohen, chill. It'll be fine."

"How can you be so calm?"

"Because we're not doing anything wrong. There were no signs. It's your boat. You rent the space."

"Right!" But he still had to put his head between his knees.

"Cohen, stop being such a girl. Come on." She rubbed his back. "What's the worse they can do."

"I don't know. But whatever it is, my parents are going to kill me. And I'm not exactly in their good graces right now."

Summer didn't have a chance to answer, because the officer returned. He handed them their license with a yellow slip of paper.

"What's this?" She asked.

"A summons. You'll need to report to court to pay a fine for trespassing."

"You're kidding, right?"

The officer shook his head. "Sorry, Miss. Not kidding. This is private property and you're trespassing."

"But it's like his boat."

Suddenly, Seth realized he was letting Summer do all the talking and if Ryan were around, he'd do something to try and protect his girl. So he took one final deep breath and said, "Look officer, at least just give me the summons. It was my fault. My girlfriend shouldn't have to answer for this."

"Sorry, son. But you were both here. Besides, I already wrote up the tickets. Come on." He waved his flashlight. "You kids need to move from here." Seeing the despair on Seth's face, the officer's voice softened. "Look, kids, it's not that terrible. You and your parents will go to court and pay a fine. It'll barely be a smudge on your record."

"If I make it to court," mumbled Seth.

"Cohen, don't be like that."

"You scared to go home, kid?"

"Wouldn't you be?"

And the officer laughed. "Okay, get going."

Summer and Seth scrambled up and followed the cop out to the parking lot. They walked back to Summer's car.

"I'm sorry, Sum."

"I know you are. It's okay."

"Is your dad going to be mad?"

She shrugged. "Maybe. He'll probably be more pissed at you than at me."

"Oh great. So I have to face Neil Roberts along with Sandy and Kirsten Cohen. This night keeps getting better and better."

"I love you Cohen."

His heart skipped a beat. He didn't think he would hear her say that ever again.

"I love you too."

"So, maybe, when your parents cool down, I can swing by and visit. Maybe…" Her voice trailed off. "Maybe Ryan wouldn't mind if I hung out in his pool house a little."

"He has a room in the big house now, but it is right next to mine."

"Even better."

* * *

Ryan followed Theresa into the dining room. The muted conversation among the adults came to an abrupt halt and Ryan said, "We're going to do the test. When can you schedule the appointment, Kirsten?"

* * *

_So the trespassing thing happened to my cousin recently on a date... and I thought the story was so funny that I had to add it into a fic._


	9. Fighting Words

_I'm impressed with myself. This is a pretty speedy update... it's not going to continue for a while. There are very busy days ahead. sigh because I really miss sitting around and writing all day. Enjoy. And usual disclaimers apply.

* * *

_

Kyle was in his usual chatty mode. After three days, Ryan had become accustomed to his supervisor's work habits. Kyle's constant chatter could fool a person, but they really did work a lot, in what Ryan had now dubbed the dungeon. They were in the throes of cataloging and computerizing the entire Newport Group Archive, but all the work was done with the incessant gabbing of Kyle. Ryan just listened, and commented every so often to remain polite. But as much was he was adapting to Kyle's constant chatter, Kyle was getting used to Ryan's quiet ways. And he had been especially quiet since dinner with Theresa and Eva and Seth had returned from his date with Summer.

Seth had found Ryan sitting in the family room, remote in hand, flipping through the channels.

"So did the parental units already turn in?" He flopped down next to Ryan, clutching the ticket in his hand.

Ryan shook his head. "They went to rent a movie."

"So, how'd it go?"

"We're taking a paternity test as soon as your mom can set up the appointment." He ran his tongue over his teeth.

"I thought that was dangerous."

"Apparently, Sandy did some research, and there's a non-invasive test you can take."

"So, that's good. You'll find out if it's yours."

"Yeah. It is." He didn't sound very convincing. "How'd it go with Summer?"

Seth sighed. "Okay. She said she loved me."

"That's great, man."

Seth exhaled deeply.

"I don't get it. You should be happy?"

He held up the yellow summons. "We got cited for trespassing. We have to go to court in September."

"What?"

Seth filled Ryan in on everything that happened. Ryan sniggered and he could tell Seth wanted to slap him. So Ryan patted him on the back. "Good going, man. You're going to get your parents off my back. Thanks for the reprieve."

Before Seth could answer with a smart comeback Sandy entered the room. "What reprieve?"

Ryan blushed.

Seth shot daggers at him.

"Hey, Seth you're home." Kirsten walked in behind Sandy. "Good. You can watch the movie with us. How was your date with Summer?"

"It was pretty good. We went to the docks to look at the Summer Breeze."

It was the wrong thing to say. Immediately the look on Sandy and Kirsten's face hardened. Ryan didn't think Seth would be able to mention his boat ever again without reminding them of his attempt at running away.

"So why is Ryan getting a reprieve?"

"Oh. Um." Seth scratched his head with one hand and stretched out his other hand. The one that held the summons. "Because of this."

Sandy smoothed out the crinkled paper and looked briefly at Seth before looking back at the yellow ticket. Kirsten peered over her husband's shoulder.

"Criminal court! Seth, what on earth were you thinking?"

Sandy put a calming hand on the small of his wife's back.

"Start from the beginning."

For the second time that night, Seth repeated the story. But unlike Ryan, his parents did not find it amusing. Kirsten's forehead creased with lines. Sandy's eyes narrowed. And Seth just sank further and further into the couch, looking like he wanted to disappear. Ryan was right, they'd forget about Chino, Theresa and the baby for a while.

"The gate was locked?"

"Yes, Mom, it was locked."

"So you decided that the most logical thing would be to climb over the fence."

"Well, when you say it like that—"

"What are we going to do with you?"

Seth looked down at the carpet, trying to keep a contrite expression on his face. Ryan was trying to figure out if he should just try and stay invisible or if he should leave the room. Sandy hadn't asked him to leave. Neither had Kirsten. It looked like Seth's verbal flogging was going to be for everyone to hear.

"The cop said it's not a big deal."

"Maybe not to him, but it is to us."

"I don't mean to minimize it, Dad. But the officer said they'll just charge a fine. It won't stay on my record. I'll pay for it. You wanted me to get a job anyway. So my paycheck will go to the fine."

"It's not the money, Seth. It's the total lack of responsibility."

"At least I'm not getting girls pregnant," he mumbled.

It was as if the earth had stopped spinning on its axis for just a minute. No one moved until Ryan decided this was his exit line. He stood up and suddenly everyone was talking at once.

"Seth!" That was Sandy.

"How could you?" Kirsten.

"Ryan, buddy, I'm sorry." Seth.

But Ryan didn't stay to hear any of it. He went up to his room and sank into his bed, closing his eyes until the next thing he knew Kirsten was waking him up to go to work. She tried to discuss it on the drive to the Newport Group, but Ryan had insisted he really didn't want to talk about it. He and Seth hadn't talked since.

So Ryan was surprised when Kyle cleared his throat and said, "Hey, Ryan, snap to it. Someone's here to see you."

Ryan looked up from the computer he was working on. It was Seth.

"I'm working Seth."

"Don't you get a break?"

"I already took one."

"It's okay," Kyle interjected. "You can take another one. I won't tell."

Ryan sighed. He didn't want to talk to Seth. Not here. There was no place private to talk and that meant everything they said would be fodder for the office grapevine. He could just picture Kyle talking over his mug of coffee to anyone who would listen. Anyone would be everyone. It seemed like the Newport Group staff thrived on gossip. The latest talk was about Caleb's impending legal troubles.

He led Seth to a corner. "I thought you were grounded. Won't your mom be pissed that you came down here?"

Seth shrugged. "I wanted to give the comic store manager one more go. If he doesn't hire me by tomorrow Dad's going to make me work in his firm. The parents are not very happy with me these days."

Ryan shrugged. He wasn't that happy with Seth these days either.

"Look, Ryan, you're totally avoiding me at home and I don't blame you. But please, give me a chance to apologize."

"Okay." Ryan crossed his arms across his chest and leaned against the wall; one leg was bent at the knee, his foot rested flat on the wall. He tried to look nonchalant. But he didn't know what Seth could say to make him less pissed.

"It was a shitty thing to say. And I thought Mom and Dad were totally overreacting. And so I just said the first thing that popped into my mind. It's not how I really feel."

"Sure it's how you feel. Otherwise it wouldn't have popped out."

"Okay. Maybe."

"Did you ever ask me if I used protection? If I asked Theresa if she was on the pill?"

Seth's face turned a deep shade of red.

"I used protection. I thought Theresa was on the pill besides. Do you use a condom every time you sleep with Summer?"

Seth's eyes darted quickly to Kyle. He could tell that Ryan's supervisor could hear every word they were saying. He let out a deep breath and said, "Summer and I never slept with anyone else and she's on the pill, so no I don't always use a condom. I know it's stupid. And frankly, before I left, Summer refused to sleep with me because Theresa was pregnant."

"So you're not exactly Mr. Responsible."

"I never said I was."

"But you have no problem pointing fingers."

"I said it was a shitty thing to say. I admit it. I don't know what to do? I can't take it back. That's what sucks about talking. Once it's out of your mouth you can't change it."

"Yeah. I know."

"You never said anything you regretted?"

"All the time. I usually go my ass kicked for it too."

"Are you trying to say you want to punch me?" Seth opened his hands wide open. "If it'll make you feel better hit me. Just not in the face. I bleed easy."

Ryan looked Seth up and down as if assessing where the best place to strike. He stuck out his tongue, his thoughts deep in concentration, noticing that Seth was starting to look very uneasy. He could see beads of sweat running down his forehead, even though the air conditioning was going full force.

"I mean it." Seth's voice was shaky. "Hit me. I won't tell Mom or Dad. So they can't get pissed at you."

And Ryan burst out laughing. "It's okay Seth. I don't need to hit you."

"So you'll talk to me again?"

"Yes."

"Play video games with me?"

"You're grounded. You can't play videogames."

"Whatever." He waved his hand. "Borrow my comics again? I know you're dying to read the new Legion."

"Yes! Seth! We're okay. Now I've got to get back to work. Okay?"

"Yeah. Fine." He turned as if about to leave. "But hey listen, this morning I saw Rosa come out of your room after cleaning up. She had half a carton of cigarettes in her hand and she went straight for the phone."

Ryan rolled his eyes, but silently he thought, "Shit." And then he wondered why Rosa was going through his stuff. He knew he had left the carton in his duffel bag. He tried to think. Where had he left it?

"See you at home."

"Yeah, see you at home, Seth."

He knew Kirsten would say something to him about it. Or Sandy. Not that he had smoked anything since Sandy had taken his pack away. But he didn't know if Kirsten and Sandy would believe him. And Kirsten was driving him to the lab for the paternity test after work. That meant she had him as a captive audience for at least twenty minutes. He knew she would never agree to let him go to the lab alone.

To his surprise Kirsten didn't mention the smokes on the ride over. She asked him about Seth's visit, one of the security guards had mentioned that he had seen Seth enter the building. He tried to downplay it, not wanting him to get into any more trouble. As it was, Sandy and Kirsten were on Seth's case since his minor brush with the law. But she didn't seem to mind that Seth had come to work things out. She seemed happy that they weren't fighting anymore.

"To this day, I hate it when Hailey and I fight."

"It's no fun," he agreed.

"But the closer you are, the more likely it is that you're going to clash. But I'm glad that you aren't holding a grudge."

He shrugged. "It's Seth. It's hard to hold a grudge."

She smiled. Ryan liked it when Kirsten smiled it was as if her face lit up with a ray of sunshine.

"Are you nervous?" she asked.

He shrugged. "About the needle or the results?"

"You don't like needles?"

"Not much."

"But you didn't even flinch last year when you had to get a tetanus shot."

"I hide it well."

"So you're not nervous about what the results are going to be?"

"It's out of my control," he said softly. The truth was he tried not to think about what would happen once the test results came in.

Theresa was waiting for them just outside of the lab. "Hi." She looked down and clutched her purse tightly to her belly.

"Hey."

Kirsten smiled wide. "Hi Theresa. You're ready?"

Theresa nodded.

"Good. I'll go tell someone you're here."

She left them alone. Ryan just stood there, not knowing what to say.

"Thanks for doing this, Ryan."

"You don't have to do this. I don't care if it's not my baby."

"Can we sit?" They walked over to a row of comfortable looking chairs. "The more I think about it, the more I want to give this baby up for adoption."

"You already told me this," he said impatiently.

"No, Ryan. I mean, even if the baby is yours."

Ryan's eyes smoldered. His nostrils flared. He clenched his jaw, he clenched his fists. "The hell you're giving away my kid."


	10. Blitz

So... it's been a while... I think. If you're interested, please read and review. Oh and the O.C. does not belong to me.

* * *

Kirsten knew something had happened the minute she came back to tell them that the technician would be with them in a moment. She just didn't know what and neither of the teens would explain. Theresa was meeting Ryan's stony glare, matching the fire in his eyes with blue, red and orange flames. She couldn't recall ever seeing either of the teens so intense. Not even when they had dropped the bomb that Theresa was pregnant.

Sighing, she sat down between them, hoping that her physical mediation would ease the tension, but it didn't. Instead, Ryan just faced forward, grabbing any magazine off the end table, flipping through the pages noisily. Theresa turned her back to both of them and crossed her arms over her chest. Her teeth were clenched so tightly that her jaw ached.

Kirsten was relieved when the technician called in Theresa. It was a silence-filled ten minutes as they waited for her to emerge from the room. Ryan didn't utter a word; didn't offer to explain. Kirsten sighed, reminding herself that even though Ryan acted like an adult, he was still a teenager. And teenagers were notorious for being sullen and uncommunicative.

"Ryan, the technician is waiting for you," Theresa said as she emerged from the room.

Kirsten watched Ryan stand. "Do you want me to come in with you?" She remembered his admission in the car. The one about not liking needles.

"It's okay. I'll be fine." He walked two steps and turned around, reminding himself that right now he was pissed at Theresa, not Kirsten. "Thanks for the offer."

When he was out of sight, Theresa said, "I'll be going now. Thanks for taking care of everything. And one day, I'll reimburse you."

"That's not necessary. Ryan's like our son. We're doing this as much for him as we are for you."

"I know."

"Will you tell me what happened?"

Theresa searched her purse for her car keys, avoiding Kirsten's gaze. Finally, she clutched the car keys in her hand and said, "I told Ryan that even if the baby is his, I want to consider putting it up for adoption."

"Oh. Wow."

"He's dead set against it. He knows he can't do anything if it turns out to be Eddie's kid, but if it's his…"

"He'll have a legal right," she finished for her.

"I know. But the more I think about it, the more I read about it, the more I realize that the best thing for this baby is to find it a good home.

"Give Ryan some time. He's still not sure if this baby is his. He needs time to digest everything and come to the same realization you have."

"I really believe this is what's best for the baby… and for us. Maybe I should have had that abortion. Everything would have been easier. But it just felt wrong at the time. It still feels wrong."

Kirsten suppressed the urge to wrap her arms around the confused teen. "You have to do what you think is best for you and the baby. Ryan will come around."

"Will you talk to him?"

"Of course. As Ryan will tell you, we Cohens love to talk."

Theresa smiled shyly and thanked Kirsten before leaving.

Kirsten and Sandy didn't sit Ryan down for a talk as he expected they would. They didn't lecture him about the cigarettes; they never even mentioned it. But a day or so later, he found a slip of paper with the neatly typed words, "Smoking makes your teeth yellow," on his bed. He didn't know for sure who put it there, but he suspected it was one of the Cohens. Though, Rosa was the one who found the smokes in the first place, so he couldn't rule her out.

The following day, there was another note about the prohibitive costs of cigarettes and an annotated list of websites on his bed. Each site dealt with teen parenthood, specifically teen fathers. Ryan obliged the mystery note leaver and looked up some of the sites. At work, when he sure Kyle wouldn't look over his shoulder he checked a few more out and read the information carefully. When he was done, he cleared the history, so that Kyle wouldn't accidentally stumble on what he was surfing.

On Friday, there was a stack of library books on the corner of his bed. He flipped through them. _Teen Smoking: Understanding the Risk_. _Teen Parenthood It's Not What You Think It is_. The rest of the books were all fiction. They were slim novels, from the young adult section of the library, which Ryan hadn't checked out in years. _Hanging on to Max. The First Part Last. No More Saturday Nights_.

He lay on his bed and took the slimmest of the books, and started to read. It was about Bobby a teenage father. For whatever reason, the mother wasn't in the picture. It was an easy read, he finished it in an hour, and he sucked in his breath thinking about what he had just read. But he was surprised that the mystery leaver chose the book, because Bobby kept his baby in the end. Not that the book didn't highlight the difficulties of being a teen parent.

He went down to the kitchen where Kirsten was busy at the stove. A young man, someone Ryan didn't recognize, was explaining the difference between a saucepan and a frying pan.

"Hi, Ryan." She smiled broadly. "This is Marco. He was going to be the chef at The Lighthouse, but he agreed to come and give me some cooking lessons. Marco, this is Ryan."

"Hi," Ryan said dully.

The chef smiled and waved his knife.

He took a step back from the knife-wielding cook. "Kirsten, is it okay if I take the car?"

"Where are you going?" She bowed her head over an onion and started to slice.

"I need to go see Theresa."

She looked up and paused her slicing. "Okay," she finally said. "The keys are on the counter. My phone is there too. Take it with you. We have to do something about getting one of your own," she added with a sigh. "And be back by eleven."

He resisted the urge to roll his eyes. It was summer and a weekend. Eleven was a pretty early curfew. It was obvious that Kirsten wanted to make sure she would be up when he returned. But he didn't argue. He'd watched Seth argue too many times, only to have Sandy or Kirsten say, "fine be back by ten."

"And call if you're caught in traffic."

"Okay."

"Wait." She wiped her hands on a towel and walked over to her purse. She pulled out a couple of twenties. "I think the car needs gas."

"Thanks." He didn't bother reminding her that they had filled up on the way home from work. He knew she couldn't have possibly forgotten. Instead, he took the money, knowing she felt more secure when she was certain that he had a few dollars on him. It didn't pay to tell her that he had his own spending money. It wasn't worth the argument.

"Drive safe."

"Thanks. Have fun cooking. If it's edible, save me some." He ducked his head as she through a towel at him.

* * *

Ryan wasn't sure why he was going to see Theresa. He just knew he had to hear what she was thinking so that he could try and understand. He knew that Sandy and Kirsten wouldn't stay passive much longer, that eventually the little hints they were throwing at him, would stop and they would insist on sitting down to discuss his options. He was hoping that it could wait until after the paternity results were in. If it was Eddie's baby, why bother trying to figure things out? He had no legal right to stop the adoption and he doubted Sandy and Kirsten would agree to take in a newborn baby. If it was his, he dared to hope, though he knew he had no right to ask. They had done so much for him already.

He flipped on the radio and tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, letting the thoughts swirl around his head. He hadn't even called to see if Theresa was in, he hoped it wasn't a wasted trip. He really wasn't sure what he was about to say, but he hoped he would find the right words.

He parked the car in front of the house, and forced himself not to look at the house he had once lived in with his mother and A.J. He wasn't even sure where Dawn was at these days. But that had nothing to do with why he was there.

He looked up again and saw Theresa standing behind the screen door. He was now certain that she was starting to show. She was wearing an oversized tee shirt, probably one that belonged to Arturo, and he knew if he pressed down, he'd feel the swell of her stomach. He'd be able to feel the baby that might be his. Just looking at Theresa caused a rumble in his bowels and it felt like they would give way to diarrhea. His mouth was suddenly parched. He didn't know why seeing Theresa was making him nervous.

"Hey, Ryan. I didn't know you were coming."

"Spur of the moment."

"What's the occasion?"

"I just wanted to talk." He met her on the other side of the screen door. "Can I come in?"

"Sure." She opened the door and led him to the kitchen. "Can I get you a drink? Something to eat?"

He shook his head. "We need to talk Theresa. I need to understand what's going through your head."

"Sit," was all she said.

"Is your mom home?" asked Ryan.

"She's working tonight."

He smiled, remembering all the times that Eva had worked nights when they were in teenagers. In some ways it was what led them to be sitting in Eva's kitchen, unable to talk, with the weight of what was to come in five months sitting between them. He didn't know why, but seeing Theresa sitting at the kitchen table with her bare feet propped up onto a chair, made Ryan go wild with desire. Her black hair cascaded down to her shoulders in soft waves. Her olive skin glowed.

The air in the kitchen was thick around them. There was only a fan in the corner, circulating the same stale air over and over. He drew in a breath and reached out to touch her glistening skin. "You look beautiful tonight."

"Ryan, say what you have to say." She wriggled her butt back a fraction of an inch, to escape his touch.

"I don't know. I-" He stopped. He didn't know how to explain. She'd laugh if he told them about the blitz of books and websites and little notes that the Cohens had started leaving on his bed. It sounded like something that would happen on a TV Sitcom. It's probably where they learned the technique. Sometimes he had to pinch himself so that he remembered it was real. That the Cohens were real. That he was part of a real family and all the corny stuff that came with it.

"I've been thinking a lot about what you said last week at the lab. And I guess I just wanted to talk to you again."

"What do you want to say?"

"That's the problem. Now that I'm here, I don't know what it is I want to say. Theresa, I love you. I love this baby. I can't imagine not being part of either one of your lives. I just don't get why you would want to give it away."

"I don't want to give it away. I love this baby too. But it's because I love this baby that I'm trying to think ahead. We are too young to raise a child. If we try, we're in danger of failing it like your parents failed you."

"That's not true."

She swung her legs off the chair and leaned forward. "Yes it is, Ryan. Think about it. How were you planning on supporting this kid?"

"By working."

"And how were you going to finish high school? Are you going to drop out? That's going to give this kid something to look up to."

He banged the table with an open hand. It stung. He stood up, shaking out the pain, bringing it to his mouth, and muttering profanities under his breath. "It wasn't my idea to get pregnant and seventeen. It happened and I'm trying to do the best that I can."

"I know." She got up and put a calming hand on his shoulder. "You're doing great. But I'm glad the Cohens and my mom stepped in. We're just kids Ryan. And I think we should try and stay kids for a little longer."

He shook his head. "It's getting late. I've got to start heading back or I'll be late for curfew."

"Ryan." She stroked his shaggy blonde hair.

He shook her off. "I've got to go."

He walked out, not turning to say good-bye, but just picking up his hand in a small wave.

* * *

Sandy kissed the top of Kirsten's head. "Honey, that meal was delicious."

"Are you still going to tell your mother I'm a lox in the kitchen?"

"Not if you keep cooking like that!"

Seth made a face as he sauntered into the family room where his parents were sitting. "Dishes are done." It figured that Ryan would skip out on him on the day Kirsten decided to learn to cook. There had been a half a dozen pots and pans to wash. But Seth wasn't going to complain. The food had been good and he was able to pick at the leftovers. "Is Marco going to cook for us again?"

"Marco did not cook for us! I cooked for us. Marco simply showed me what to do!" She playfully swatted her son's backside. "Show some respect for your mother."

"I ate the food didn't I? I didn't crack any jokes about possibly being poisoned."

"He's right," said Sandy.

"Okay," she conceded. "Thank you for that. And thank you for taking care of the dishes."

"And I put away a plate for Ryan, just like you asked. Though he doesn't deserve any since he left us here to taste the food for him. I bet he figured that if he we were alive and kicking when he came home that it would be safe to eat the food."

Kirsten laughed. "As opposed to lying on the floor writhing in pain." She knew her son and husband would never tire of teasing her about her cooking abilities. Even if she became the next Julia Child they'd find away to tease her about her cooking.

"Anyway, I'm going to go up to my room to pretend I'm reading while I'm really using my computer even though I've been grounded."

Sandy glared at him.

"Joking." Seth held up his hand and backed out of the room. "Not," he muttered under his breath.

When they were alone, Kirsten nestled into the crux of Sandy's arm. "We have to talk to Ryan when he gets home."

"How'd he react to the latest blitz on his bed?"

"He ran to Chino to talk to Theresa."

"Okay. That's good. Maybe he'll start to see her point of view."

"I've been thinking Sandy."

"That can be dangerous."

She slapped him hard on his belly.

"Oohhmphh." He gasped. "That hurt."

"Don't insult me. I'm trying to be serious."

"Okay. Sorry. You were thinking about what?"

"Do you think if it would be easier for Ryan and Theresa to give this baby up for adoption to someone they knew and trusted. Someone they could stay close to?"

Sandy fidgeted under his wife's weight. "What do you mean?" All the humor was gone from his voice.

"We could adopt Ryan and Theresa's baby."

"We don't even know if it's Ryan's baby."

"Then we don't suggest it until the paternity results come in."

"I don't know Kirsten."

"Ryan is too young to be a father."

"True."

"We can offer this baby a lot. It would have a wonderful father and two great big brothers."

"One big brother would really be its father."

"The baby wouldn't have to know until he or she is old enough."

"Have you thought of what it would be like to have a baby in the house again?"

"Yes." She looked up at Sandy and outlined his lips with her index finger.

"It wouldn't do anything for our sex lives."

"Like having two teenagers under our roof has?"

He laughed. "They seem to be getting lots of action. More than us…."

She groaned. "Don't remind me." Looking up at Sandy, she said, "You're thinking about it, aren't you?"

"Of course I am. You knew I would."

The phone rang. Kirsten glanced at the caller ID. "It's the lab. The one where Ryan and Theresa took the paternity test."

"So pick up."

Swallowing, Kirsten pressed the talk button. "Hello."

"Is this Mrs. Cohen?" There was a crackling on the line.

"Yes. This is she."

"My name is Sam Rappaport. There was a note in my file to call you with the results as soon as they were in."

"Yes. Thank you."

"I hope it's not too late. I was just trying to catch up tonight."

"No. It's fine. We just finished dinner. So, what were the results? Is our son the father of this baby?"


	11. The Results

It's been so long since I've updated, I'm not even sure if anyone is still interested. I'm sorry it's been so long , but I promise I have a really good excuse. Actually, there's more than one excuse. But I won't get into it here.

_Sady I don't own any of the characters of the O.C. I'm just playing around. (Get your mind out of the gutter!)_

* * *

Even though Ryan had cited curfew as an excuse to leave Theresa, he had plenty of time to get home unless he got caught in major gridlock. He just didn't want to stay and listen to Theresa talk about giving up their baby – if it was their baby. In his heart the child was already his, even if it didn't share the same DNA. No one else could see it or understand it.

Everyone else was too focused on the pitfalls of being a teen parent. But what they – Sandy and Kirsten - couldn't comprehend was that he had never done anything spectacular. His entire childhood had been all about survival. Making sure that he had enough to eat and clean clothes, when his mother was too drunk to worry about mundane household chores. He had to worry about Dawn's latest boyfriend and if he would treat him well or use him as a punching bag.

Ryan Atwood had been even less than ordinary. And now he was part of the miracle of life and they couldn't understand that he wanted to live up to his responsibility and to make something great of the accident of life. He clenched his jaw as all his thoughts swam through his head until it hurt. He didn't know if he could make them understand.

When he reached the development where the Cohens lived he decided at the last minute not to go home yet. He wasn't ready to sit down with Sandy and Kirsten for the inevitable talk. So Ryan just drove, not really pay attention to where he was going. Instead, he concentrated on emptying his mind of all thoughts. Marissa had once described how she did it when she took yoga classes.

Marissa. Ryan hadn't called her since he had come back to Newport. He didn't even think he was interested in seeing her anymore. He guessed they could try and be friends, but Ryan didn't want to get caught up in her drama. She hadn't called him either, and since she was living with Caleb and her mother, he assumed she knew he was home. If not Summer would have told her.

At eleven thirty Kirsten's cell phone rang, breaking him out of his reverie. He glanced at the caller ID. It was either Sandy or Kirsten. He was late and they were checking up on him. He didn't know why, it was as if a stubborn streak possessed him, but he turned the phone off. He knew they'd yell at him when he got home so he turned the car around and started back. Even so, he didn't get back until midnight.

Both Sandy and Kirsten were waiting for him with worried expressions.

"Where were you? Theresa said you left her house over two hours ago."

"And why didn't you pick up the phone when I called?"

Innocently, he glanced down at the metallic flip hone he held in his hand. "Sorry. I forgot to turn it on."

The look Kirsten gave him told him she knew he was full of crap.

"Theresa wants you to call her, no matter what time you get in." Sandy's voice was softer than Kirsten's. "She's worried. Call her. Then we have to talk."

Ryan nodded. He turned to go find the phone, but stopped to ask, "Am I grounded?"

Kirsten put her hands on her hips. "What do you think?"

"Okay. Dumb question." In the family room, he dialed Theresa. "It's me," he said. "Sorry, if you were worried."

He could hear her smile at the other end of the line. "Oh. I figured you were just driving around. Sulking. I saw how you left."

Ryan glanced over his shoulder and saw that Sandy and Kirsten were deep in conversation. "So, why did you really want me to call?" He sank into the couch and brought his feet up to his chest.

"Because I thought of something after you left. I just need you to listen to me. Don't interrupt. Okay."

"'kay.'

She took a deep breath. "You're so insistent that you want to raise this baby. That you're ready to take on the responsibility. But I think you like being the kid."

"What?" He wasn't following her train of thought and she had just started.

"Shut up and listen Atwood." She paused. "You were really pissed when Sandy came to get you. I mean. I know you wouldn't talk to him for days. But it's just two weeks later and you haven't complained for a while. For some reason, I noticed that tonight."

He started to interrupt, but Theresa cut him off.

"You said you would listen. I can tell you're not mad about that anymore. I know how you are when you're angry. And it hit me. You're not mad, because the Cohens were doing what parents do. And you never had that. But now you do. So why do you want to give it up? We can give this kid a better life and you can keep being a kid."

He chewed on his lip until he tasted blood. "Can I talk now?"

"Yes."

"I just need to think. Okay? I don't want to put too much effort into thinking about this until we have the results of the paternity test. I know it's a cop out, but what's the point of thinking and stewing if this kid isn't mine. I won't get to decide."

"Oh. Um." Theresa swallowed. "Okay."

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Theresea."

"Nothing. Maybe you should talk to the Cohens."

"As soon as I hang up with you."

"Then good-bye."

"You sound like the AOL lady."

She laughed. "Shut up Atwood." And she hung up the phone.

Ryan stood to put the receiver back on its cradle.

"Ryan, are you ready?"

He sighed. His eyes were getting droopy, but he knew that this was about more than just being an hour late and not checking in. He sat in the chair and let them sit on the sofa.

"The lab called while you were out."

"Oh." So that was why Theresa had suddenly turned so cryptic. He couldn't imagine that the lab would call in middle of the night, but then again, he knew Kirsten and Sandy had thrown their weight around to make sure the results were expedited and that they were informed right away.

"You're the baby's father."

He nodded. His stomach did a strange flip-flop, but he couldn't tell if it was because he was sad or happy, nervous or tired. His arms and legs tingled all over. He Ryan Atwood was going to be a father.

Kirsten hesitantly put a hand on his knee. "You look green. Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Yeah," he breathed. "I knew it was my baby, but now I really know."

"I know that means lots of decisions for you," Sandy started.

"I want to be part of my kid's life."

A meaningful look shot between Sandy and Kirsten, but Ryan didn't understand what it meant.

"It's obvious you guys want me to consider adoption. Unless Rosa was the one leaving all those notes. I particularly enjoyed the one about smoking making your teeth yellow."

Kirsten pursed her lips. "You're trying to change the subject. And don't think I'm finished about the half carton of cigarettes that was found in your room."

"Why was she snooping in my stuff?"

"The bag and its contents fell out of the closet when she went to put your things away. But you're trying to get off topic, and I won't have it. This is serious. You're too young to be a father."

"It's not fair to have Theresa raise this kid on her own."

"She's talking about adoption. You're the one hindering that decision."

Ryan looked at Sandy who was unusually quiet. "You think I should agree to the adoption?"

Sandy sighed and leaned back on the couch. "Yeah. I do. Being a parent is more than just a monetary support and making sure a kid is healthy, dressed and well-fed."

"I know that."

"Give me a chance."

Ryan folded his arms across his chest and despite his sullen expression Sandy knew he would continue to listen.

"Part of being a parent is giving up a part of you. After Seth was born, I never felt complete without knowing he was happy and safe. And this year, when you came to live with us, that feeling extended to you. But I was an adult when Seth was born. I had my opportunity to be a child, so I was ready to lose the small part of yourself that you give up. Ryan, you just became a child in some ways. Don't give it up just yet. In the end, you'll just resent this kid and how will that affect him or her?"

He cast his eyes to the floor, not sure how to respond to Sandy. "I'd never hurt my child."

"I didn't say you would. But kids are smart. Don't you sense when Kirsten or I are mad at each other or when we need some alone time?"

"You guys are sort of obvious."

"It's a perception kids have."

Ryan knew what he meant. Even as young as three or four he knew when his father was mad or when Trey was sick of taking care of him. When he got a little older it was which boyfriend wasn't interested in dealing with kids. Last year he had perceived that Kirsten was weary of her choice to bring him into her home, though he knew she no longer felt the same. So he knew that Sandy was right, his kid would pick up on these things. The question was would he really resent this child?

"We said a lot Ryan. The result of the paternity test in its self is a lot to handle. So go to sleep. Give it some time and think about it."

"What if I decide to keep the child?"

"We'll burn that bridge."

"No. I mean, what if I want to keep it and Theresa doesn't? Will you kick me out?"

"Ryan!" Kirsten's voice was sharp. Not sympathetic. "We've gone over this. You're part of this family. What do have to do to make you believe in us?  
"Nothing. Sorry."

"It's okay kid." Sandy slapped him on the knee. "Go to bed."

Sandy and Kirsten were holed up in their room all morning, talking in hushed whispers. A few times, Ryan approached their room and picked up his hand to knock, but each time he stopped, pressed his ear to the door, couldn't make anything out, and walked away. He knew they were talking about him. It seemed like lately they were always talking about him.

Finally, he decided to find Seth and see what he was up to. Ryan found Seth sitting by the pool reading his tattered copy of _Kavalier__ and Clay_.

"How many times have you read that?" He slid into the lounge chair next to Seth.

"I lost count." Seth put the book down and looked at Ryan. "What are you up to today?"

"Nothing. Grounded."

Seth raised his brows. "Golden boy?"

"Shove it."

"So what are you in for?"

"I'm not sure if it's being late or not answering your mother's phone once I was late. Either way, Kirsten was annoyed. But it's just for the day."

Seth nodded. "Sure beats my sentence."

"They'll ease up eventually."

"Yeah, but I have to go to court in a couple of weeks. Then they'll just be reminded yet again of what a screw-up I've been."

"They don't think you're a screw up Seth. If anything, that title is reserved for me. The results for the paternity test are in. I'm the father."

Seth whistled under his breath. He stole a sideways glance at Ryan and then looked out over the pool. "So what's next?"

"Theresa seems serious about adoption. And your parents are pretty obvious in what they want."

"What do _you_ want, Ryan?"

He shook his head, his bangs fell into his eyes. The sinking and fluttering feeling in his stomach was again. He thought about how the baby was something great that he could do. He thought about what Theresa had said about him wanting to be a kid. He thought about how Sandy said being a parent meant giving up a part of your self. And Ryan didn't know how to answer. But he didn't have to.

Sandy and Kirsten came out to the pool and stood in front of Ryan and Seth. Sandy snaked his arm around Kirsten's waist and she leaned into him.

"Ryan, we just got off the phone with Theresa. She's driving down here for lunch. Go get ready. We're going out to eat."

"I'm not invited?" Seth chimed in.

"You're grounded," his mother reminded him.

"So is Ryan."

"We just need to talk with Ryan and Theresa alone," Sandy explained.

"You should have just said that in the first place. It's more baby talk. Fine with me. But if I got a vote, I'd say Theresa should give the baby to us and you guys should raise it. I know I'll make a great big brother."

Seth didn't see Sandy's grip tighten around Kirsten's waist or the look that Kirsten shot at Sandy. Ryan saw it. He just thought they were thinking that Seth had finally done it; their son had finally gone over the edge.


	12. The Lunch

_Usual disclaimer applies

* * *

_

Ryan straightened the cutlery in front of him and moved his water glass an inch to the right and then to the left. They were waiting for Theresa to arrive. She had called and said she was running late and Ryan was sitting with the Cohens - a heavy silence hanging over the table. Kirsten toyed with the gold bracelet, a gift from Sandy for their fifteenth wedding anniversary. Sandy kept looking at his cell phone, checking the time, and making sure he hadn't missed any calls, while avoiding Kirsten's eyes.

"Maybe we should order," Sandy finally suggested.

"We should wait for Theresa. What do you think, Ryan?"

"Whatever."

They were acting weird, Ryan thought. There was no doubt in his mind that this lunch was all about the baby. But what did Sandy and Kirsten intend to discuss? Would Sandy use the same methods he had exercised to bring Ryan back to Newport? Would he blackmail Ryan and Theresa into doing what they wanted? What did they want?

He studied the menu, trying to find something he thought he could tolerate. There was a queasy, uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach, that hadn't left since Sandy had announced that the baby was his. Ryan was certain that any heavy food would come up. And while they weren't dining in a five-star restaurant, he didn't think the waiters would appreciate the mess he might create.

"Sorry I'm late." Theresa ran in breathless. Her hair was tied back in a back pony. She tucked the few strands of stray hair behind her ear and said, "My doctor's appointment ran late."

"You had a doctor's appointment?" Ryan's head snapped up. "W-why didn't you tell me?"

Shrugging, Theresa took the empty seat. "I didn't think it was a big deal."

"It's my baby too, Theresa. I'd like to be there for both of you."

"Well, you aren't there for me anymore, are you?"

Ryan looked down at his plate and mumbled, "You know I didn't have a choice. You told me to go."

"Fine. Whatever. I'll tell you next time."

"Don't be like that."

Ryan's voice turned sharp and Theresa gasped audibly.

"Ryan." Sandy put a hand on his arm.

"I know we still have a lot of decisions to make, but please don't cut me out of things."

It was Theresa's turn to stare at her empty plate. "I'm sorry. My next appointment is in two weeks."

"So soon?" Kirsten asked. "Is everything okay?"

"The doctor is just being cautious. He thought my blood pressure was a little bit too high. He's going to keep an eye on it."

"I'll come," Ryan said firmly.

"If that's what you want."

Ryan bit his lip, fighting back an angry retort. He didn't get it, because Theresa had practically begged him to leave his life in Newport to help her raise their child. He had come and had only left when his hands were tied and at her urging besides. So why was she being so cool and distant as if he had done something to her? He hoped it was her pregnant hormones.

"It's what I want."

"Okay."

"Good."

"Would you like to order?" Kirsten tried to break the tension.

"Sounds good. I'm famished." Theresa grabbed the oversized menu and opened it. She studied the list of appetizers and entrees while chewing the inside of her cheek. Ryan looked at her, and realized she was fighting back tears.

"The steak here is really good." Ryan's voice was soft as if he were trying to make amends for snapping at her. "So are the cheeseburgers."

She smiled. "A cheeseburger sounds good."

Sandy signaled the waiter who took their order. Five minutes later Sandy was nursing a beer, while Ryan looked on longingly. The women had mineral water and Ryan had a coke, which he sipped grudgingly. No one said much of anything until the food was in front of them. But even then, no one started eating.

Finally, Kirsten threw her napkin down on the table. "This is ridiculous," she said. "Theresa, are you serious about giving up this baby for adoption?"

Without batting an eyelash, she answered, "I've made up my mind to do it. I discussed it with my mother and we know this is the right thing to do. It's up to Ryan now. But if Ryan wants to raise this baby, he'll do it without me."

"Well, I just found out I have any say in this, so don't expect me to make up my mind overnight," he jumped in, startled by Theresa's declaration that she was definitely giving up this child.

"We don't," Sandy assured his charge. He held a fork and knife in his hand, but put it down, realizing that no one would actually be doing any eating on this lunch date.

"Sandy and I had a long talk and we thought of something." Kirsten turned to Ryan. "Seth wasn't so off this morning. Sandy and I want to offer to adopt this baby."

"I can't ask you to do that."

"That's too much," Theresa agreed.

Kirsten took a breadstick from the basket in middle of the table. She tore it in half, but did not put any of it in her mouth. "Sandy and I tried for years to have a baby after Seth was born. We wanted our children to be close in age. But it didn't happen. I went to a couple of doctors, but didn't really get to deal with it, because my mother got sick and we put expanding our family on the wayside. I've never been able to get pregnant again and the doctors told me I never will."

"We thought of adoption," Sandy continued, squeezing Kirsten's hand under the table. She was a lot like Ryan, and didn't wear her thoughts and feelings on her sleeve like he and Seth did. He knew this was hard for her. "But it was never the right time. But this seems like the right thing to do. I promise you both we can give your child a good life."

"And if you want, Theresa, you can still see the child and see where he or she is up to. Ryan, of course, you'll be part of his life. We thought it would make it easier for you, to give over the responsibility of raising a baby yourself. You'd be its big brother. And later on, when he or she is older, we can discuss if it should know that you're really its father."

Ryan shook his head. "I can't ask you to do this."

"You're not asking. We're offering," explained Sandy.

"I can't answer you right away."

"Of course not. We just wanted to lay it out for you." Kirsten turned to Theresa. "Would you agree to let us raise this child?"

"If that's what Ryan wants, it would be fine with me. I know you're good people and that you'll do your best with the baby."

Ryan pushed his chair back. "I need some air." He stood up. "I'm just going to walk a little. I'll get home on my own."

Kirsten and Sandy exchanged looks.

"Take my cell phone." Sandy gave him the metallic phone. "And answer it if we call you."

"Okay."

Ryan blindly walked out of the restaurant a million thoughts swirling through his head. He nearly knocked a waiter over, who held hot soup in his hands. The hot liquid must of have splashed on the man, because Ryan heard him mutter a few curses. He apologized and ran out.

He wasn't sure how to get to the beach or the pier, so he just walked up and down the streets, trying to organize all the thoughts in his head. He could hear Theresa telling him that he liked being a kid. That he wanted someone to take care of him. He knew she was right. But that didn't change his need to make sure his child had everything that he didn't have. And he knew that Sandy and Kirsten could give his baby everything, including unconditional love, guidance and nurturing. But he didn't know if he could ask them to do that or if he could grow up letting his child think he was his big brother. It didn't seem right.

The sun was getting high in the sky. Ryan didn't know how long he had been walking, but he was hot and sweaty. There were wet patches under his arms. His feet ached and he could feel blisters forming on the back of his feet. He sat down on a bench and put his head in his hands. He felt the phone vibrating in his pocket, and took it out to look at the caller ID. It was Kirsten. Or Sandy. He briefly considered not answering it, but knew they would throw a fit if he did that again.

He hit the send button. "Hey."

"Ryan, it's Sandy. Where are you?"

He looked around. "I have no idea."

"You have us worried, kid."

"Sorry. I was just walking."

"This entire time?"

Ryan nodded and realized that Sandy couldn't see him through the phone. "I just sat down when the phone rang."

"You left the restaurant five hours ago. You haven't sat down since?"

"It's been that long?"

"You're freaking me out, kid," Sandy said in a hushed voice.

"I'm okay. Just a lot on my mind."

"I'm going to come and get you. Give me some street names so that I can find you."

Ryan stood and walked to the corner. He squinted up at the sign and read it off to Sandy. "You practically walked back to Chino. Just sit tight. It'll take me a half hour or so."

"Fine."

He went back to the bench and sat down; grateful he didn't have to start figuring out how to make it back to the Cohens and grateful he didn't have to go begging for a ride home. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back on the back of the bench trying to empty his mind of everything. The next thing he knew, there was a hand shaking his shoulder. Ryan tensed every muscle in his body, taut and ready to pounce on the would-be attacker.

"It's just me, Ryan. You fell asleep."

His face flushed red.

"Ready to go home?"

"Yes," he mumbled.

"Need to talk?" Sandy offered, walking to the car and opening the passenger door.

"No more talking." Ryan climbed in.

"Okay." Sandy slammed the door shut and walked around to the driver's side. "Talking is way overrated."

"So why do you guys do it so much?"

"I'm Jewish. I'm a lawyer. I thrive on the gift of gab. I can't help it."

Ryan laughed.

"I know this has been hard for you. We're just trying to help."

"Is that what you were doing when you dragged me back to Newport by the scruff of my neck?"

"I told you, I was making sure you didn't throw away your life. Kirsten and I want to make sure you don't throw away what's left of your childhood." Sandy shifted back in the leather seat. "College was a great time for me. Even before I met Kirsten, I felt like I was free. I didn't have my mother around breathing down my neck. I had a whole new world to explore. I was really living it up. I acted crazy and stupid, but I also did a lot of growing up. I want you to have that. But I also understand your sense of responsibility to this kid. We just want to make it a little easier for you."

"I know."

"You don't have to agree to it, if you don't want to. Theresa said she would leave it up to you. She figures this way we could all have our way. She can get on with her life. Kirsten and I can raise another child, so we don't have to worry about empty nest syndrome for another few years. And you can make sure that your child is well taken care of. You can still be right there, but you don't have to give up school, or your friends, or your childhood."

"It's just a lot to think about."

"I know. And you don't have to make the decision right away."

"Thanks Sandy."

Sandy turned his head away from the road and looked at Ryan. "Kirsten and I, we love you. We'd do anything for you. You're part of our family."

Ryan threw himself into the work at the Newport Group to try and stop the swirling, whirling thoughts that nagged at his mind. The Cohens hadn't discussed the subject any further. Even Seth left things alone, even though his parents had filled him in on their offer. Seth had a right to know that he might be gaining a new brother or sister.

* * *

Three days after his lunch with Theresa and the Cohens, Ryan was sitting beside the pool. Summer was on an adjacent lounge chair and Seth was climbing out of the pool. Sandy and Kirsten had slowly started to relax the terms of Seth's punishment. So Summer was spending a lot more time at the house.

Ryan was enjoying the visits. Together, Seth and Summer had a knack for distracting Ryan. They could do it without even trying. Their constant bickering, doe-eyed expressions, and sweet-talk to each other was enough to make anyone puke, but Ryan relished it, because it took him far from his reality.

"Seth, don't drip on me."

"Where should I drip?"

"On Ryan. On the concrete. Anywhere but me."

"You're a lot less scary than Ryan. I'm pretty sure he hits harder."

Summer punched Seth in the arm. "Owe. Maybe not."

Ryan grinned. But the corners of his mouth dropped when he heard Kirsten calling their names in a panicked voice.

Seth's heart skipped a beat when he heard his mother cry out. As he scrambled out of his chair, Ryan at his heels, he grabbed the cell phone that was at the edge of his seat and dialed nine-one-one, but he waited to hit the send key. Thirty seconds later, Seth and Ryan skidded to a halt in front of Sandy's study. Kirsten was on the edge of her chair, looking frightened but unscathed.

"There's a bird in the office."

"God, Mom, you scared us." Seth hit the end key on his phone, realizing an ambulance would not be necessary.

"There's a bird in the house."

Ryan and Seth heard the frightened fluttering of the bird in a strange place. It flew from the edge of the Venetian blinds to the ceiling, dropping a present on the carpet below.

"Get it out!"

"How'd it get in there?"

"I don't know, Seth. But your job now is to get it out." She ran out of the room.

"Any ideas, Ryan? You're the brawn."

Ryan rolled his eyes. "You need brains. Not brawn. Why don't you try opening a window?"

Seth shrugged. "Okay." He walked towards the window, wondering once more how the bird got in if the window was closed. Ryan closed the door behind him. "Why are you doing that?" Seth asked, not relishing the idea of being in closed quarters with a wild bird.

"So it doesn't fly out into the rest of the house."

"Good move."

Seth climbed onto the windowsill and opened the window from the top. The bird flapped around and Seth ducked. Ryan laughed.

"Laugh all you want. But I refuse to get bird shit in my hair."

"Ducking won't help."

"How do we get it out?" Seth waved his hands. "Here birdie, birdie, bird. Exit is right here." He pointed to the open window.

"It's a bird. Not a dog." Ryan bit his bottom lip so Seth wouldn't see how much he was enjoying this. He wondered if he raised the baby if there would be zany times like this with Seth or would it all be stress and perpetual motion?

The bird jumped to the bookcase, leaving another present on the carpet.

"Well do something. Don't just stand there."

Ryan took a large volume off of Sandy's desk. The cover said it had something to do with family law. He marched under the ceiling fan, held the book open and slammed it shut, so that it created a loud thud. The bird jumped and flew off of its perch and headed straight for the open window. Seth sighed with relief and quickly shut the window to ensure it didn't return.

"So family law saves the day. If it weren't for all of this baby confusion that bird might still be in here, making all over the place."

"There's a bright side to everything." Ryan traced circles on the velour. "I don't know what to do."

Seth plopped down on the couch, suddenly remembering that he was wet and cold. But Ryan was talking, so he didn't get up again in the hopes of finding something to wear.

"I'd love a little brother or sister."

"What about a niece or nephew?"

"No. I'm too young for that. I prefer the former."

"I know kids back in Chino who were aunts and uncles when there were barely out of diapers."

"That just sounds wrong. Besides, they didn't have to help raise the kid. You know, I can see it Ryan, the only reason you're hanging back on this decision, not agreeing to it right away, is because you think that once again you're taking from the parents. And I'm telling you that that's what they're there for."

"They're your parents."

"They're my parents, true. But I know that they signed the papers saying they'd act in loco parentis. That makes them your parents too. And you know they've gone way beyond the guardian thing. They'll do whatever you want Ryan. But don't give everything up when there's a perfectly viable solution."

"So you think I should let your parents raise this kid."

"That or give it up for adoption. I don't know what's better. But I do know that _you_ should not be raising this kid."

"Okay. Okay. You're right." Ryan jumped up and paced the floor, avoiding the spots where the bird had dumped its waste. "I'm not going to raise this kid by myself. But I'm not saying that I'm going to let this kid think I'm its brother."

"Fine." Seth slapped his knee. "At least we narrowed it down to two choices. Knock off one more and we'll arrive at a decision. In the meanwhile, I'm going to put on some clothes so I can take them off when I make out with my girlfriend. Ciao."

Seth mocked saluted and left Ryan alone in the office.


	13. Court Date

_Last chapter I forgot to thank **Sister Rose **for taking a look and basically reassuring me that it was okay. So a belated Thanks **Sister Rose**. Thanks for all the wonderful reviews. I'm glad some of you liked the "bird scene." I wasn't sure about that one - but was compelled to put it in. Let's just say there was some real life to it._

_As usual, I don't own any part of the OC. Otherwise, I'd be lots richer. Oh and my usual legal disclaimer. Despite my cousin in law school, I really have very little understanding of the law and how it works. Keep reviewing folks, it keeps me going._

* * *

Seth entered the kitchen dressed in a button down shirt and slacks. His curly hair, which he had let go wild, was combed neatly and gelled down. It was the first time Ryan had seen him dressed all summer. Sandy couldn't even convince Seth to wear anything but jeans and a ragged t-shirt to the office, much to his chagrin. But Sandy had decided it wasn't a battle worth fighting.

"Why the get up?" Ryan asked.

Even though he wasn't as primped as Seth, Ryan was obviously dressed for more than a day at the Newport Group. The tie, which he had abandoned after the first day of work, was back. His hair was neatly combed to the side. His wrist cuff was nowhere to be seen.

"Looks like we'll both be going to the courthouse today. Dad pulled some string and pushed up my court date."

So this was about Seth's trespassing citation.

"Summer's coming too?"

Seth nodded. "But she just told her dad all about it and he's so royally pissed he won't allow her to talk to me."

"That sucks."

Seth slid into the stool next to Ryan and grabbed the cereal box out of his hand. "It does. I mean, it's not like I meant to get her into legal trouble."

"So this is going to be a family event?" Ryan asked, changing the topic from Summer. Ryan knew there was no answer. Mr. Roberts would eventually cool down, or Summer would start seeing Seth despite her father's wishes. If they could get past Seth's leaving and Summer's not going to join him, then they could get past this.

"Yup. You meet with your probation officer and I explain why I was trespassing at the docks."

Ryan grabbed the box back from Seth and stuck his hand inside.

"We can afford bowls, Ryan."

His face flushed red and he pulled his hand out of the box. He took the bowl Kirsten handed him and sheepishly poured his cereal.

"You boys look handsome," Kirsten observed.

"Are you coming too?" Seth asked.

She shook her head. "I have an important meeting with Grandpa's lawyers. But your dad will be there. Sandy will make sure you're both taken care of."

"I have to tell my PO that I got Theresa pregnant."

Kirsten nodded. She knew that Ryan had agreed he wouldn't raise the baby on his own, but he still hadn't decided if he would give his child to her and Sandy. For the most part, she was tiptoeing around Ryan, working hard not to prod him into making a decision he wasn't ready to make. She didn't want to send him over the edge.

"It won't affect your probation? Will it?" asked Seth.

Ryan shrugged. But Kirsten jumped in. "Of course not. There's no law that says you can't have sex, even if you are underage." She didn't miss Ryan's face turning tomato red all over again. "Your PO will just question how you plan to proceed and even if you don't have all the answers, you have some solid options to present."

Ryan pushed away his bowl and told Seth and Kirsten he would be back in a minute. He went out to the pool house where he had stashed a few packs of cigarettes. He found one of the packs, pulled out a smoke, walked to the side of the pool house and lit up. He didn't care if Sandy or Kirsten caught him, because he desperately needed the nicotine to steady his nerves. Lately, he had taken to using all his breaks at work to smoke. He knew Kyle smelled the smoke on him, but he wasn't the type to go squealing on the boss's kid. And by the time he met up with Kirsten, whether it was for lunch or at the end of the day, Ryan made sure the nicotine odor was long gone.

He leaned the sole of his sneakers on the pool house wall and leaned his head back. He closed his eyes, inhaling deeply and keeping the smoke in his lungs for a count of five.

"I spoke to Dr. Tally, my mother's oncologist, last night. He said the chemo was working, but that she was at risk for infection."

Ryan sighed at the sound of Sandy's voice. He stubbed out the cigarette against the wall and handed the smoke to his guardian.

"Where are all the rest of them hidden?"

Ryan waved his arm, indicating around, but he didn't say anything.

"I want every pack on my desk by the end of the day. And after we finish at the court house I'm stopping at a pharmacy to buy you a nicotine patch."

"Is that really necessary?"

"Obviously. You know, you won't be able to smoke if there's a baby in the house. You might as well start quitting now."

"Who said there was going to be a new baby in the house?" Ryan regretted his tone instantly even more than his words. "I'm sorry."

"Apology accepted."

He could tell from Sandy's words that Ryan had crossed a line. "I'm glad the chemo is working on your mom."

"Me too."

Seth stuck his head out the back door and called out to them. "We're going to be late."

Sandy dug into his pocket and pulled out his car keys. He tossed it to Seth and told him to start the car. They would meet him there in a minute. "I want you to get to know my mother. Smoking is why you didn't get the chance to know her already. You're young. Quit while you're ahead. When my mom started smoking, people weren't aware of the dangers like they are today."

"It helps me."

"Well, we'll find other things to help you." Sandy swung his arm around Ryan's shoulder. "Come on, kid, let's get going. And I'm serious, every one of those packs better be on my desk by the end of the day. If I catch you smoking again…" Sandy let his voice ominously trail off, hoping Ryan got the message. He had been about to joke that he would tan his hide, something he often threatened Seth with, even though he didn't mean it, but knew it wouldn't be appropriate with Ryan's history. It was one more way that he couldn't treat his boys the same.

* * *

Ryan finished with his PO and went to wait for Seth outside of the courtroom. He wasn't sure what to expect from Mr. Rodriguez, but he definitely hadn't expected the kind and encouraging words that his PO had offered. Leaving the meeting, Ryan felt confident in his ability to decide the best thing for him and his baby.

He arrived at the correct room just as Summer was coming out with her father at her heels, and Seth was going in. They stopped briefly, their fingertips touching, before Mr. Roberts nudged Summer and Sandy prodded Seth forward. Ryan slipped into the room, and watched as the judge began to interrogate Seth.

"The fact that the gate was locked didn't indicate that you didn't belong there?"

Seth looked down at his hands. "I- I guess I wasn't thinking very clearly." He swallowed hard so that his Adams Apple bulged. "My boat is docked there. I couldn't imagine why I wouldn't be allowed there. I always had full access to the boat in the other place it was docked."

"Do you always make it a habit of climbing over fences?"

Seth shook his head. "No sir. I'm too much of a klutz."

The judge chuckled, but even so Sandy pinched Seth's side. "Don't sound irreverent," Sandy muttered from the side of his mouth.

Seth lowered his gaze. Ryan was enjoying seeing Seth squirm. It wasn't him for a change.

The judge was shuffling his paper. "You have good grades. You don't have a record. And your girlfriend pleaded your case well. I'm inclined to dismiss the ticket and let you off with a warning. But let me see you in my courtroom again and you will feel my full wrath, young man."

"Thank you, sir. I promise you'll never see me again."

"Good." He banged his gavel and called for the next case.

Sandy swung his hand around Seth's shoulder and smiled broadly. Ryan followed them out and heard Sandy say, "Get into anymore trouble like that and you'll first feel the full wrath of your mother and me."

"I got it. Don't worry. I won't cross you. Besides, I'm still under house arrest for like the next ten years."

Sandy noticed Ryan. "How was your meeting?"

"Good. Mr. Rodriguez was cool about the whole pregnancy thing."

"I'm glad. I didn't think it would be a big deal." They stepped out onto the courthouse steps and Sandy breathed in deeply. "I always feel so claustrophobic inside that place. Come on. Ryan we're going to the pharmacy and then we'll drop you off at the Newport Group before Seth and I head to the office."

"Um, I told Kyle I wouldn't be in today. I need to meet with Theresa."

"Does Kirsten know? Because she gave me the impression that she expected to see you there today."

Sheepishly, Ryan shook his head.

"So call her." Sandy indicated to Ryan's new phone. Kirsten had picked it for him the week before. It had come with a whole list of rules and Sandy could tell Ryan would have rather been without it. But Sandy knew that a phone was a good as way as any to keep tabs on the boys. Seth had one and it only made sense that Ryan should have one too. As close as they were, they weren't glued to each other's sides. Ryan had tried to refuse, but he and Kirsten had insisted.

Ryan pulled out his phone and dialed Kirsten. He told Kirsten that he wouldn't be in and apologized for not telling her in advance, but assured her that he had told Kyle. He filled her in about his meeting with Mr. Rodriguez, turning away from Sandy and Seth, hoping for a little privacy. Sandy must have not told Kirsten about his cigarettes, because she didn't sound angry and Ryan took that as a good sign.

* * *

"I'll see you at home," Ryan said an hour later, a nicotine patch firmly placed on his upper arm. Sandy wouldn't leave him until they had read the instructions and Ryan had started the regiment. He waved and walked into the Dunkin Donuts, where he had told Theresa to meet him.

She came twenty minutes later, looking flushed.

"You okay? Here. Take a sip of my water."

"I'm okay. I think this is my new look. I just need to sit. My feet are starting to swell."

"What did the doctor say?"

Theresa shrugged. "Nothing. I don't go for another week. And you'll be there, so you can hear for yourself." She settled into the chair and asked Ryan to order her a decaf latte with skim milk. "Two Splendas," she added.

"That's not good for the baby."

"My doctor told me I can use Splenda. It's not the same as nutra sweet. If they don't have Splenda, you can make it two sugars."

Ryan pursed his lips, but Theresa could see he would do what she asked. He came back five minutes later with two steaming cups and two donuts.

"Thanks." She picked up the latte and sipped. "So why did you want to meet?"

"I don't get it," he jumped right in. "The Cohens offered to adopt the baby and you didn't even blink. You said yes right away. Why?"

"Why not? I told you, I'm determined to give up this baby. The Cohens already proved themselves. They take great care of you. They're good parents. They're not abusive. They have wealth and power. They're well respected. What more could you ask in adoptive parents?"

"But you won't be able to make a clean cut from them."

"Why not?"

"Because when you see me, you'll see the baby. Won't that be weird from you?"

"Who said we're going to see each other?" She asked vehemently. "As soon as I have this baby I'm moving to Atlanta. As far as I'm concerned, we never have to see each other again."

Ryan's mouth dropped open. He felt like the breath had been knocked out of him. He loved Theresa. Maybe not like he should love a girl, but she was his first friend and his best friend from childhood. They shared a past. And he had always assumed they would share a future. He didn't understand why she was acting like this.

"What the hell did I do to you?" He leaned forward, whispering loudly, hoping their heated conversation would attract any undesired attention.

"Besides knock me up?" she asked loudly.

"Sshh."

"Why?" She didn't lower her voice.

"What the hell happened?"

"Nothing happened. I just wish you'd make up your damn mind instead of leaving me hanging. There are only a few more months and if you don't want Sandy and Kirsten to adopt the baby then we have to look for other adoptive parents. It's not going to happen over night."

"It's been two weeks! What the hell do you want from me?"

"I want you to just stop brooding and to stop thinking and just decide, dammit. It's not brain surgery. You already told me that you've decided not to try and raise this kid on your own." By now, it wasn't only Theresa's cheeks that were red, but her neck and ears and the rest of her face. The red patches were splotchy all over her face and Ryan could tell that she was way beyond angry.

He looked around frantically, trying to figure out how to calm her down, because by now her blood pressure must be sky high and that was probably bad for the baby. It was probably bad for Theresa too.

"I can't rush it. These are life decisions. I'm about to make. And I'm trying to think of what's best for this baby, not just for me. I mean, if I'm thinking about me, then I say great let Sandy and Kirsten raise this kid, because then I can be part of its life. But the truth always comes out and how screwed up will this kid be, when he discovers big brother Ryan is really Dad? You make it sound so easy," he rushed on breathlessly. "It's as if you washed your hands of all this and now you just want to get it out of your way."

"I do. Sometimes I wish I had just gotten the abortion."

"Well sometimes I wish it too," he spat out, but immediately regretted his words.

She threw her crumpled napkin on the table and got up. "Find your own way home. I'm going. When you finally make up your mind, call me." She left the unsaid words hanging in the air, don't call me until then.

Ryan sat back in his chair, watching as Theresa stalked out of the donut shop, leaving him alone to try and figure out what just happened. They were fighting and he wasn't sure why.

His phone buzzed and he saw that it was Seth on the caller ID.

"Hey."

"Hey. You still with Theresa?"

"No. She left."

"So you can talk?"

"Yeah," Ryan sighed.

"Good. Because Dad was totally hyperventilating on the way to the office. He wanted to know what you two were talking about. If everything was okay."

Ryan leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table and holding his new phone close to his ear. With his free hand, he picked at the donut sitting in front of him, shredding the thing into pieces, and basically mutilating the crème filled donut. He just wasn't hungry.

"I just wanted to talk to Theresa. It was no big deal. But we got into a fight."

"About what?"

"I don't know. In the meanwhile, Theresa left in a huff and now I don't have a way to get home."

"I'll pick you up."

"No. You'll have to ask your dad for the car keys and that's going to start a whole interrogation. Let's just leave it."

"You sure?"

"Yeah. I'll take a cab. I have enough cash on me. I better go and get all the cigarettes out of the pool house, before Sandy does a search of his own."

Seth chuckled. "I was wondering. But every time I opened my mouth to ask, Dad gave me this death glare." Seth waited for Ryan to say something, but when he didn't, Seth continued, "Listen, if you want to talk and figure things out, I know Dad will let me leave early."

Ryan waited a beat. His first instinct was to tell Seth no, but then he realized that maybe Seth could help him figure things out.

"Yeah. I'd like that."

"Great. Then I'll see you at home."


	14. The Choice

_Usual Disclaimers apply. Not only do I still not own any of the O.C., but I still don't know a lot . Like I don't know much about child birth...._

* * *

Four Months Later

"Ryan, it's time."

He rolled over on his side, groggily rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He held the receiver away from his mouth and glanced over at the clock. It was three a.m.

"Time for what?" He groaned.

"A beer," Theresa retorted sarcastically. "What do you think, moron? It's time for the baby."

Ryan sat up in bed, his cover tumbling to the floor. "It's too early."

"No it isn't. I mean, it is, but it's okay. I already started my ninth month. It's safe to deliver."

"Are you sure you're in labor?" He swung his legs over the side of the bed, shoving his feet into his slippers.

"My water broke and my contractions are Seven minutes apart. Just get the hell over here, before you miss the whole thing."

"Okay. I'll go get Sandy and Kirsten. We'll be right there."

He had always assumed that it would happen while he was in school. He had planned to keep his phone on vibrate and safely tucked in his pants pockets, despite the rule prohibiting cell phones during class. Sandy had offered to talk to Dr. Kim to get a special dispensation, but Ryan didn't want Dr. Kim to know about Theresa. He had worked hard all year to change her mind about him, and knowing that he had knocked up a girl would just remind Dr. Kim about who he was and where he came from.

Ryan rapped loudly on Sandy and Kirsten's bedroom door. He shifted from foot to foot, hoping he wouldn't wake up Seth. He couldn't handle Seth's rambling at that moment (and he was bound to ramble). He knocked again, louder, until a sleepy Sandy came to the door.

"What's up kid?" He stifled a yawn.

"Theresa called. It's time."

Sandy whistled. "We'll meet you by the Range Rover in five minutes."

Ten minutes later, Ryan bit his lip, willing Sandy to drive faster, but refusing to say anything. He didn't want another withering look from his guardian. He had had his share over the past few months.

"Are you ready for this, kid?"

"Ready as I'll ever be. I don't think this baby cares if I'm ready or not."

Luckily there was no traffic during the early morning hour, so that the usual hour trip to Chino Hills General Hospital only took forty minutes. Ryan didn't wait for Sandy to throw the car in park, before he tumbled out of the SUV. He ran to the maternity ward, Kirsten close at his heels.

"Ryan, wait up. We should stick together."

"I don't want to miss anything."

"Wait," she demanded.

He stopped and let her catch up.

"I'm sorry. I'm just anxious to be with Theresa. I promised her I'd be in the delivery room."

"Another minute won't make a difference."

"It seemed very close."

"Trust me, this can go on forever. I was in labor with Seth for twenty-five hours."

"Huh?" Ryan titled his head and cocked his brow.

"Yup." Sandy walked up behind his wife and placed his hand on the small of her back. "It was the worst twenty-five hours of my life. She drove me crazy. Don't be so eager to hold Theresa's hand. She's going to curse you out and call you every foul name in the book."

Ryan laughed. "Even so…" He started to walk again, throwing a backwards glance over his shoulder to make sure that Sandy and Kirsten were following him.

As soon as he arrived at the maternity ward his stomach formed a huge knot. Bile rushed to his throat and he couldn't answer the nurse when she asked how she could help. Fortunately, Sandy and Kirsten were close behind.

"We're looking for Theresa Hernandez. She's in labor."

"I'm her coach." Ryan choked the words out.

The nurse typed something on the computer and clicked a few times. "Theresa Hernandez is in room four. You'll need to wear a gown and a hat. And you are?" She peered over her glasses at Sandy and Kirsten.

"Here for moral support," supplied Sandy. "We'll stay in the nearest waiting room."

* * *

"Hey Theresa."

She let out a blood curdling scream.

"If it's a bad time, I can come back."

"Don't you dare leave, you sniveling little shit! You got me into this mess, you get me out."

Warily Ryan approached her. She was dressed in a standard issue hospital gown and sitting up, propped up by the bed. Her hair was already matted down to her forehead, and her brow glistened with perspiration. Ryan wasn't sure if he wanted to be close to her.

"What can I do?"

"Turn back the clock and don't have sex with me."

"I'll go call Christopher Lloyd and ask for his time machine."

Theresa hit his arm.

"Owe. That hurts."

"Not half as much as what I'm going through."

"I didn't know it was a contest."

She slapped his arm again.

"If you keep hitting me, I'm just going to leave."

"Did you call them?" She asked, grimacing in pain.

Ryan wet a paper towel and ran it across her forehead. "Not yet."

"You should call," Theresa insisted. "You promised them you'd call."

Ryan sighed. "Is it okay to leave you?" He pointed to the sign above her head. "No cell phones allowed here."

"Fine. Make it quick."

Ryan left the room and Kirsten immediately pounced on him. "Is everything okay?" she asked.

He nodded. "I just have to call them," he said softly.

Kirsten seemed to sink back into her heels. "Of course. They should be here." With her head down, she walked away from Ryan into Sandy's open arms.

Ryan turned so he wouldn't see Kirsten sobbing softly into Sandy's shoulder. He dug the phone out of his pocket and flipped it open. Slowly, he punched in their number and called. They answered on the tenth ring. While rubbing the back of his neck, he told them how to find him and Theresa in the hospital and they said they would come right away. Ryan stole a glimpse of Kirsten and Sandy huddled together in the waiting chairs, before he went back to be with Theresa. He thought he was doing the right thing.

* * *

Theresa was still in labor two hours later. But the doctor assured them the baby would be there shortly.

"You're nearly at ten centimeters," he explained. "It won't be too much longer. Just hang tight."

"Easy for him to say," she muttered. "There is something way wrong about a man becoming an Obstetrician. He will never truly be able to empathize with his patient. He'll never know what it feels like to carry a kid in you for nine months and then have to push it out of this tiny—"

Another contraction hit Theresa. She leaned forward, but the nurse admonished her not to push. Ryan held her hand, allowing her to squeeze his fingers, until he couldn't feel them anymore.

"Breathe deeply," he urged.

"Shut the f—"

"Can it," Ryan said, not hiding his irritation. "I didn't come to be abused. I'm trying to help. Let Mrs. Gonzales come and hold your hand or your mom. You wouldn't talk like this to either of them."

She leaned into the back rest. "Sorry," she breathed. Tears fell down her face. "I'm sorry. I'm being an idiot."

"It's okay. I love you anyway."

"Why don't you ask Mrs. Gonzales to come in here for a little while? Take a break. Go sit with Sandy and Kirsten."

Ryan nodded, though he wasn't thrilled at the suggestion. Now that it was happening, he couldn't look them in the face. He was so certain that they had asked to raise the baby to make things easier for him. He never imagined that Sandy and Kirsten had really wanted to raise another child. He closed his eyes, doubting his decision for the second time that day.

"Is Theresa okay?" Sandy asked.

Ryan slumped into a chair next to him. "Yeah. She's fine. Mrs. Gonzales, she asked if you could stay with her for a little while."

The olive-skinned woman stood, and smiled shyly. "Thank you."

Ryan didn't want to talk. He didn't want to face Kirsten. She looked sad, instead of happy that the baby was coming. And Ryan knew he was the cause of the sadness. So when Seth ambled up to them, Ryan let out a sigh of relief. Seth would alleviate the tension. He would start rambling about something inane and take his mother's mind off the fact that Ryan was not giving them his baby.

"It's an interesting feeling waking up alone in the house when it was full of people when you went to sleep."

"Did you find the note?" Kirsten asked.

"I found it. Taped to my mirror. It was still weird. I wasn't worried or anything." Seth surveyed the scene around him. "So, how come you aren't with Theresa?"

"I'm taking a break."

"Good. You want to get a coffee with me?"

Ryan stared at the delivery room and started to shake his head no. But Kirsten said, "Go. We'll call you on your cell if they call you. You need the break."

Glad to get away from them and not being forced to stay by Theresa's side sounded good. It sounded like exactly what he needed. He stood and followed Seth.

As soon as they were out of his parents' earshot Seth asked, "Why do you look like you're going to a funeral instead of a birth?"

"Your mom," Ryan started. He didn't know how to finish. "She really wanted this baby. It wasn't just about helping me out, was it?"

Seth shook his head. "At first that's what I thought. But no, it seems like they really wanted another kid. I've been trying not to take it too much to heart. You know, you'd think we'd be enough."

Ryan smirked. He was right. Seth could always lighten the mood.

"It's not too late to change your mind, man. Tell the Gonzaleses that you decided you want to raise the baby. Then when things settle down Mom and Dad can adopt like the original plan."

"It's too screwed up. I made the right decision. Besides, it wouldn't be fair to them. At least, your parents have you. They have nothing."

Seth shrugged. "It's your call. I know Theresa will do whatever you want."

They stopped at the end of the coffee line. "It's not too late," Seth said, before launching into some tale about Summer and Mr. Roberts and they're latest clandestine meeting.

* * *

The contractions were coming faster and harder. The doctor instructed that she still couldn't push and Ryan wished the baby would hurry up, because he wasn't sure he'd be able to use his hand during the upcoming midterm exams the following week.

"You know," Theresa said, during a brief moment she had free of pain. "You can change your mind."

Ryan fed her an ice chip with one hand and wiped her forehead with a wet towel with the other.

"What do you mean?"

"You don't have to leave the baby here tonight. You can let Sandy and Kirsten take it home." Another contraction hit. "Dammit," she cried. "If I don't get this baby out of me soon, I'm going to start going ballistic." She muttered something in Spanish, which Ryan didn't catch. He didn't think he wanted to understand her. "It's your baby, Ryan," she said through gritted teeth. "You have a right to raise it or at least watch it being raised by good people. I know what the Cohens are asking is a little hard. They want to raise it as their own, but they're good parents."

When the doctor walked in to examine her, Ryan stepped back, hoping to stay unobtrusive. But he was glad that the physician said Theresa could push on the next contraction. He was anxious for everything to be over and done with.

It only took three pushes and a perfect, cherubic little girl was put on Theresa's stomach. The baby was matted with blood and goo. She had a thick head of black hair which was matted down, not unlike her mother and big brown eyes that deliberated her new surroundings before letting out a loud wail.

"She's beautiful, Theresa. She looks just like you. Can — can I hold her?"

Theresa was weeping unabashedly and Ryan was discreetly wiped away tears from the corners of his eyes before he held out his hands. He knew it wasn't a good idea to take the baby in his hands. The adoption agency had strongly advised against it. "Emotions are high," they explained. "Holding the baby will start a bond that will be hard too break when you have to give the baby up."

"She is so beautiful, Theresa." With the baby nestled in the crook of his arms, he bent down to kiss her forehead. "You did good, Mamma. Do you want to hold her?"

"Don't call me that! I am not this child's mother. Mrs. Gonzales is. Or if you want, Kirsten is. But not me."

Ryan swallowed. He didn't understand Theresa. He didn't know if he ever would. Mostly, he had come to his decision, because he felt like he had no choices. He knew he couldn't raise the child on his own, without the love and support of Theresa. And pretending to be his daughter's big brother was just wrong. His only choice had been to give up his daughter. And now, holding her in his arms, he didn't know if he could do it.

"Ryan. Can I hold her?"

It was Mrs. Gonzales. She had her arms outstretched, hope written all over her face. He nodded his head and relinquished his perfect little girl. As soon as she was secure in her arms, Ryan retreated from the delivery room.

* * *

No one had mentioned school, but it was understood that Ryan would take the day. Seth had stayed hung around, and neither of his parents had said anything. Ryan glanced at his watch. He should be sitting in Calculus. Instead, he was gazing through the nursery window at his daughter.

"She's beautiful."

Ryan started at the sound of Sandy's soft voice. His guardian placed a hand on his shoulder and rubbed the tense muscles.

"It's okay to change your mind. There's a reason for the legal grace period. The Gonzales can find another child to adopt if you decide you want to raise her."

Ryan didn't try to hide his shock.

"She's your daughter. She's a part of you. Kirsten and I, we'll help you. You won't have to do it alone. We'll hire a nanny for the day, while you're in school. If you want, we can make it work."

"No. No," he breathed. "I know I couldn't handle it. And I know how much you and Kirsten want another baby, but I think the best thing for my daughter is to let the Gonzaleses raise her."

"Are you sure?"

Ryan nodded.

"Then let's go home."

Ryan turned from the window with tears streaming down his face. He followed Sandy to the car, where he was met by Kirsten and Seth. They all climbed into the Range Rover and started the long silent drive back to Newport.

* * *

_So, I actually did it. I finished before the start of the season. I hope it doesn't seem too rushed. At one point, I was considering a "Choose Your Own Adventure" type of story, where you could choose which decision Ryan makes.... But really, the story had to end and I wasn't going to cop out like that author of the The Lady and the Tiger. I so appreciate all the wonderful and supportive reviews. They've been great. _


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